Yesterday, while most of America slept and prepared themselves for another day of work as productive members of society, Craig Fitzgerald had been up for hours scheming and plotting to take a blatant cheap shot right across the steely jaw of BangShift. He came right at me with THIS BLOG ITEM at BestRide.com that used 17th century language to defame my taste in cars and trucks, hurt my feelings, and cause strife between us. Remember when Craig posted cool stuff here? He was blinded by the fame and fortune of steering his own blog and he left us like a teen girl heading to an ISIS camp.
Two things. The first was a gross miscalculation on his part regarding how offended I’d be by his story. Because I am semi-literate, many of the words did not register so I ignored them. Secondly and perhaps most importantly, I have been keeping a secret file on Criag in the event he tried to start something like this. Because we have experienced blog wars in the past, I was ready for his surprise attack and I plan on countering it below. Safe to say, relations between BangShift and BestRide.com have dug to a new subterranean low and I have posted guards outside of BangShift eastern world HQ to prevent any “fence jumpers” or other such badness. Craig would wall off his compound but it is nearly impossible to build a wall light enough to be hauled around in the windowless Japanese van he calls home.
CRAIG LIVES HERE -
IF YOU HAVE NOT SEEN CRAIG’S BRAZEN ATTACK ON ALL THAT IS RIGHT AND GOOD WITH THE WORLD, READ IT HERE BEFORE CONTINUING
Now let’s get onto it, shall we?
The man insulted my Caprice, my Goliath truck (which I don’t even own anymore), and my tow truck Brutus. He did this without any consideration of his own automotive tastes and proclivities, which make mine look more normal than white bread. This guy is fighting some serious inner demons and I am here to expose them. For starters:
His station wagon -
His last project car -
THE BOMBSHELL -
OK, I’ll stop there for now but I have a feeling that this will be a long and protracted fight. That’s ok BS Eastern World HQ has supplies and ammo stocked for the long haul. The BestRide Information minister is predicting victory, but this guy has a habit of doing that (incorrectly) already. Your turn, Fitzgerald!