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  • Telemarketers

    The National "Don't Call" list has put a real dent in the pestering calls we would all get at suppertime. I can attest - it works. Thank goodness. We used to get ten calls a day from salespeople and now we got none.

    But I was going through the files getting set to update the website for the week and came across this. I am so glad this is such a blast from the past:

    When they ask "How are you today?" Tell them!

    Number 10: "I'm so glad you asked because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems; my arthritis is acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my dog just died."

    Number 9:
    If they say they're John Doe from XYZ Company, ask them to spell their name.
    Then ask them to spell the company name.
    Then ask them where it is located.
    Continue asking them personal questions or questions about their company for as long as necessary.

    Number 8:
    Cry out in surprise,
    "Judy! Is that you? Oh my God!
    Judy, how have you been?"
    Hopefully, this will give Judy a few brief moments of pause as she tries to figure out where the hell she could know you from.

    Number 7:
    If MCI calls trying to get you to sign up for the Family and Friends plan, reply, in as SINISTER a voice as you can,
    "I don't have any friends... Would you be my friend?"

    Number 6:
    If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for bankruptcy and you could sure use some money.

    Number 5:
    Tell the telemarketer you are on "home arrest" and ask if they could bring you a case of beer and some chips.

    Number 4:
    After the telemarketer gives their spiel, ask him/her to marry you.
    When they get all flustered, tell them that you could not just give your credit card number to a complete stranger.

    Number 3:
    Tell the telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask them if they will give you their HOME phone number so you can call them back.
    When the telemarketer explains that they cannot give out their HOME number, you say
    "I guess you don't want anyone bothering you at home, right?"
    The telemarketer will agree and you say,
    "Now you know how I feel!"

    Number 2:
    Insist that the caller is really your buddy Leon,playing a joke.
    "Come on Leon , cut it out! Seriously, Leon , how's your momma?"

    And first and foremost:

    Number 1:
    Tell them to talk VERY SLOWLY,
    Because you want to write EVERY WORD down
    Charter member of the Turd Nuggets

  • #2
    Re: Telemarketers

    I was had a summer job trying to sell welding rod and other stuff from LaGrange to farmers over the phone. Ever try to sell anything to a farmer much less over the phone? Truly sucked, but it paid for my first car.
    BS'er formally known as Rebeldryver

    Resident Instigator

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    • #3
      Re: Telemarketers

      Rebel, I guess what you were doing was to a targeted audience. You knew you were calling a farmer and were trying to sell something you knew they could use.

      I get those calls every day at work. It's about work-related things, things we can't buy now because we're bankrupt. Now, there's an easy answer to their inquiry. But in better times, I may be interested in what they have to sell.

      But at home? Here in Tennesse, it was awful. We were renting an apartment and got three calls a day from somebody wanting to sell vinyl siding for our house. They wouldn't listen to reason. They just wouldn't stop.

      Charter member of the Turd Nuggets

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      • #4
        Re: Telemarketers

        I have the same problem because I don't have an apartment number. Each apt has it's own house number, so I get calls for mortgage restructuring and carpet cleaning almost daily. I'm on the Fed Do Not Call list.

        I'm getting rid of my home phone next month for this reason and I'm tired of paying for something that doesn't get used anymore.
        BS'er formally known as Rebeldryver

        Resident Instigator

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        • #5
          Re: Telemarketers

          Originally posted by Rebeldryver
          I'm getting rid of my home phone next month for this reason and I'm tired of paying for something that doesn't get used anymore.
          Be sure to add your cell number to the do not call list. Cell numbers have been made available to the telemarketers as well.

          Register your phone number to report stop or block unwanted, annoying,telemarketing, spam calls, robocalls to the FTC



          Ron
          It's really no different than trying to glue them back on after she has her way.

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          • #6
            Re: Telemarketers

            Cell numbers have been made available to the telemarketers as well.
            The bastards STILL call my cellphone and I'm on the do not call list.
            Act your age, not your shoe size. - Prince

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            • #7
              Re: Telemarketers


              I'm sorry if this has been posted before but when the word "telemarketer" comes up, this clip always comes to mind.

              http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y4xsGQYTRns


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              • #8
                Re: Telemarketers

                Studemax,

                These SOB's get your phone number from places where you have signed your name, unknowingly authorizing them to call you. These places can range from entering a drawing to opening a checking account. Simply ask them to remove your name from their calling list, do not call you again and do not distribute your name or number to anyone else. The next step is imperitive...

                Ask them in a cool, calm voice, "Do you understand me?" Make them say yes. This will stop them in their tracks.


                Have fun!


                Ron
                It's really no different than trying to glue them back on after she has her way.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: Telemarketers

                  Originally posted by studemax
                  Cell numbers have been made available to the telemarketers as well.
                  The bastards STILL call my cellphone and I'm on the do not call list.
                  Get them to give you the name and address of the company they work for. At some of the shadier places, that's an instant hang-up, and probably no future calls from them.

                  If it's somebody you've never dealt with, ask the telemarketer if an employer who doesn't care about Federal telemarketing laws can be trusted to actually be paying their tax withholdings, or may have just been pocketing their income taxes and planning to leave them on the hook. Or do similar things to make the employees start distrusting the telemarketing company they work for. Leave him wondering if he should just walk out of the office after hanging up, and tell any co-workers he's befriended why. Getting revenge on the person who calls is quite entertaining, but it can be even more amusing to sow distrust, chaos, and suspicion in the organization itself.

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                  • #10
                    Re: Telemarketers

                    Guys, I'm no fool - I've done all the stuff you suggest, and more.
                    These bastards don't care what threats you make, or how mean you sound.
                    They have the upper hand, and they know it.
                    So I just close the phone.....
                    Act your age, not your shoe size. - Prince

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                    • #11
                      Re: Telemarketers

                      i only get recordings asking me to call whatever ## pisses me off to no end...So I fixed it... I nowhave home phone # but no home phone...We all have cell phones....a,little spendy but worth not having these duche bags bug you all the time
                      If you can leave two black stripes from the exit of one corner to the braking zone of the next, you have enough horsepower. - Mark Donohue

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