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Funny Craigslist ad

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  • Funny Craigslist ad
    2002 Focus ? good reliable first car - $2000 (Cape Girardeau)

    Date: 2010-04-01, 10:33PM CDT
    Reply to: [email protected] [Errors when replying to ads?]

    Looking for a first car for a teen? This car is absolutely brilliant. It?s got low mileage (68k), has been super reliable, and is excellent on gas. Since you?re likely paying for the gas, this will make things much cheaper on you. I average like 37MPG to a tank. And with such low mileage, it?ll work great for a long long time.

    But you wanna know the best reason to buy this car for your kid?

    It?s slow as sh--. You don?t have to worry about speeding tickets or accidents in this baby. Your kid could have a 1 mile run and hit a brick wall not wearing a seatbelt and not be going fast enough to do sh--. And there won?t be any sense in him getting some sh---y a-- fart can off of eBay ? this car has the super slow SPI engine, no sense in trying to make it any faster. It?s a 4-door, so your kid won?t try to put gay a-- Lambo doors on it. It is still possible to fit this with a body kit, but if you?d like, for an extra $200, I can stab him in the face if he does this.

    It?s a 5-speed, so your kid can?t talk on his cell phone while playing Gameboy and smoking pot ? he?ll have to actually pay attention. It also means you won?t have to pay for an automatic transmission when your kid beats the hell out of it. It?s got a new clutch and new tires, so you?ll know if he does burnouts. After all, I?m sure YOU?RE the one paying for tires, right? It?s got an aftermarket head unit in it, so your kid won?t f--- it up when him and his buddies try to wire in a ?phat a-- system?. It?s already had the speakers replaced too, so he won?t have to tear the door cards on and then look like a retard when he can?t get them back on. It?s got manual windows too, so he can?t f--- up the window motors when he rolls one of his friends heads up in it as a joke. A new battery means when he leaves his headlights on, it won?t leave you totally stranded.

    But really though, one of the best parts is that, because it is a 4 door, it will be somewhat embarrassing for him to be seen in. I?m sure you get pissed at him from time to time. Hell, you?re probably mad at him for harassing you into buying him a first car. So get this one. It has no A/C, so you?ll know he?s suffering every time you get mad at him. Pretty satisfying. It?ll bring a smile to your face too, to know he?s rolling around looking like a faggot in a Ford Focus.

    So buy this car for your kid. You won?t regret it

    Contact: 573-334-4363

    Location: Cape Girardeau
    it's NOT ok to contact this poster
    President, Wicked Rides Poland

  • #2
    Re: Funny Craigslist ad

    spotted the ad at jalopnik. My problems with attempting inline four and front wheel drive go way back to the first fords with is sickening to see the same retarded mentality putting it together. I am glad there is no chance for magnesium fires anymore. I hope...

    Previously boxer3main
    the death rate and fairy tales cannot kill the nature left behind.


    • #3
      Re: Funny Craigslist ad

      That is a hilarious ad!

      It's really no different than trying to glue them back on after she has her way.


      • #4
        Re: Funny Craigslist ad

        well at least hes honest ;)


        • #5
          Re: Funny Craigslist ad

          From Cape?!! That's AWESOME!! :D
          The former Remy-Z

          "Remy-Z, you've outdone yourself again, I thought a Mirada was the icing on the cake of rodding, but this Imperial is the spread of little 99-cent candy letters spelling out "EAT ME" on top of that cake."


          • #6
            Re: Funny Craigslist ad

            COBEY..... franklin, kansas