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Polar Bear

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  • Polar Bear

    I'm on duty this week, which is why I haven't spread much mirth. Come Monday, I can be me again, much to y'all's chagrin.

    This week I was "invited" to "participate" in a big show in the big conference room. All of the performance improvement teams were reporting out to all of the big wigs. These were all cross-functional teams - with a manager for the team leader and people from maintenance and production workers, some of whom had never spoken at a big gathering before. Several guys, when it came their turn, were visibly shaking and usually said, "I'm really nervous," or something along those lines.

    I can stand at the lecturn and get it all said, but I don't really like having to do it myself, even after lots of times.

    So, there was this one team with this one guy who looked like he wanted to just hide or disappear. Everybody on the team except for him had spoken, and at the end of the presentation, the team leader looked to him and asked, "Rick, do you have anything to add?" Rick said, "No Wes, you did good."

    At that everybody in the audience started to politely applaud the team and they all started back to their seats. But Rick just stood there by himself, waving his arms. "Wait! Wait! Can I tell a joke?"

    The team leader turned around and grinned and said, "You can do anything you want."

    So, with a totally captive audience, including the mill manager and some visitors from corporate, Rick told this joke. Everybody was shocked but captivated at the very idea - all of a sudden telling a joke in a "professional" setting. Here's the joke Rick told, and there were a whole lot of us glancing at each other the whole time wondering where in the hell this was going:

    A daddy polar bear and a little polar were floating along on a chunck of ice. The little polar bear said,"Dad? Am I 100% polar bear?"

    The dad said, "Son, of course you are. I'm 100% polar bear, so you are, too."

    The little polar bear then asked, "What about Mom? Is SHE 100% polar bear?"

    The dad said, "Sure. Believe me, I did all the research before your mom and I hooked up. Both sides of the family, far back in history, 100% polar bear."

    They floated on the chunk of ice for a short while more and the dad said, "Son, why are you asking all of these questions?"

    The little polar bear gathered his courage and said, "Dad, I have to tell you something. I've been trying to hide it for quite a while."

    The dad said, "Son, what in the world IS it?"

    The little polar bear said, "Well Dad..............................I'm freezing to frickin' DEATH!"
    Charter member of the Turd Nuggets

  • #2
    Re: Polar Bear

    PW you are a gas, my eyes are watering.


    • #3
      Re: Polar Bear

      Whenever I was in a meeting like that,I always asked the speaker if we could vote somebody off the island.
      The person that laughted the loudest was ALLWAYS the least liked person.
      Calypornya...near the beach