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Me and a friend were banned from Kmart for life when we were teens for donning plastic army helmets, grabbing plastic toy guns and invading the lingerie department and coming out with spoils of war. I wonder if we are still on the list 30 years later.
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i have done the alarm clock thing a few times and one of my favorites is when I get seperated from my wife in a store and I go looking for her, I get about 20-30 feet away and yell out "HEY LADY COME BACK WITH MY BASKET !" always a good one for getting attentionLeave a comment:
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This is bahaviour that I intend to emulate. I HATE WallyWorld.
DanLeave a comment:
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repost but I do know that some of those items can get you banned from a store (I had a boring college life).Leave a comment:
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Banned For Life--Shocking lack of a sense of humor
Although i've been on medical leave for about 6 months now, my wife insisted i accompany her every other day thru a certain establishment, who shall remain nameless , suffice to say ,they are based in Arkansas....and it 's not Tyson Chicken. She received the following letter today.
Dear Mrs. XXXXX
Over the past six weeks, your husband has been observed causing quite a commotion in one of our stores. Although we certainly appreciate each of our customers business, we will not tolerate this type of behavior.
On April 1, Your husband took 24 cases of condoms and placed them in other peoples carts, without their knowledge.
On April 3, He was observed setting all the alarm clocks in housewares to go off at 5 minute intervals.
On April 6, He made a trail of tomato juice leading directly to the womens restroom.
On April 10, He went to the service desk, and loudly argued why he couldn't put a family size bag of M&Ms on layaway.
On April 15, He was observed moving a "Caution Wet Floor" sign to a carpeted area.
On April 18, He set up a tent in the camping area and loudly announced that the first 20 kids who returned from the bedding department with pillows and blankets, could camp out that night in the store.
On April 28, He looked directly into a security camera while picking his nose.
On May 1, Your husband darted around the store, suspiciously, while humming the "Mission Impossible" theme. He even claimed to be "Mr. Phelps"
On May 5, He was observed in the auto department, practicing his "Madonna" look, while trying on different sizes of funnels.
On May 8, While hiding in a clothing rack, he would keep whispering to our customers, pick me, pick me"
On May 11, In the hunting department while looking at a shotgun, he loudly asked our associate "where's the antidepressants"?
Fianlly, this past Friday, May 13, He was observed going into the mens dressing room with a pair of trousers, and after a few minutes, exclaiming, again loudly, "There's no toilet paper in here".
Because of the aforementioned episodes of your husbands " sophmoric behavior". We are asking you to take your business elsewhere.
If you attempt to shop here in the future, you, and your husband will be escorted from the premises.
Now, i take no issue with most of what they said.......I do think the "Sophmoric Behavior" remark was a bit over the top, but what the hey.
That's one down, and one to go....I always liked Targets stuff better anyway...just hope they have a better sense of humor.....
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