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‘TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS’

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  • ‘TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS’

    ‘TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS’
    CAMARO STYLE

    Twas the night before Christmas and out in the garage,
    There wasn’t a trace of a Honda, Toyota, or Dodge.
    The presents were wrapped and the lights were all lit,
    So I figured I’d mess with the Camaro a bit.

    I popped the release and lifted the hood,
    When a deep voice behind me said “It looks pretty good.”
    Well, as you can imagine, I turned mighty quick,
    And there, by the workbench, stood ol’ Saint Nick!

    I stood there a bit, not to sure what to say,
    Then he said. “Don’t suppose that you’d trade for my sleight?”
    “No way, Santa” I said with a grin,
    “But if you’ve got the time we can go for a spin!”

    His round little mouth, all tied like a bow’
    Turned into a smile and he said ”Sure! Let’s go!!”
    So not to disturb all the neighbors” retreat,
    We quietly pushed the car to the street.

    Then, taking our places to coast down the hill,
    I turned on the key and let the clutch spill.
    The sound that erupted took him by surprise,
    But he liked it a lot, by the look in his eyes.

    With tires a’screaming and headers aglow,
    We headed on out to where the Hot Rodders go.
    And Santa’s grin widened approaching his ears,
    With every shift as I banged through the gears.

    Then he yelled “I CAN’T RECALL WHEN I’VE FELT SO ALIVE!”
    So I backed off the gas and asked Santa if he would drive.
    Ol Santa was stunned when I gave him the keys,
    When he walked past the headlights he shook at the knees!

    The Camaro exploded with a sweet exhaust sound!
    And when Santa popped the clutch and the tires shook the ground!
    Power shifting in to second, again into third!
    I sat there just watching, at loss for a word,

    Then I heard him exclaim as we blasted from sight,
    “Merry Christmas to all, it’s one hell of a night”


  • #2
    Re: ‘TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS’

    Oh yeah baby, Ma Ma likes this Santa story.....

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: ‘TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS’

      I'll settle for the Mopar-version if that's allright... ;)



      'Twas the night before Christmas and out on the streets,
      Only Mopars were winning against Fords and "Heartbeats."

      The stop lights were hung over the streets with care,
      Getting ready to change for those drivers who dare.

      The children were nestled all snug in there beds,
      While visions of Hot Wheels danced in their heads.

      My wife was on the phone and I in the garage,
      Staring at my Miss Mopar collage.

      When out on the drive rolled up such a rumble,
      You knew for the owner it was hard to be humble.

      I recognized the sound but had to see for myself,
      I knew this was no blue oval elf.

      I was right, there it was, in it's plum crazy glow,
      A '71 426 'Cuda built for go.

      The black billboard split as the door opened wide,
      A large sack of parts was then tossed outside.

      A leg swung out with a tall black boot,
      Then there he stood in a red and white suit.

      It was Santa, St. Nick, in all of his glory,
      "But Santa, please tell me, just what is the story?"

      "Where is your sleigh, your eight tiny deer?"
      He said "I traded them in on 425 horses and a 4.10 gear!"

      "I test drove 'em all, every single musclecar,
      But none can beat 'Cheevies' like a Hemi Mopar!"

      "And son you've been good and learned all the tricks,
      So I'm swapping your small block for a 426!"

      Then he grabbed up his tools and went straight to the chore.
      The swap took one hour, no less and no more.

      This guy was good, but something wasn't right...
      Santa couldn't have learned to do that overnight.

      He torqued the last nut and then walked away,
      "With this," he said proudly, "you'll beat 'Cheevies' all day!"

      All at once it hit me, I recognized the voice,
      His skill with the tools, his words of choice.

      Once I figured it out, it was really no surprise,
      This was Big Daddy Don Garlits in a Santa disguise.

      He collected up his tools and went back to his ride,
      Put his stuff in the trunk and hopped back inside.

      With a whine of the starter, the beast came alive,
      And with a shift to reverse, he backed out of my drive.

      With pistol grip in hand he shifted into first,
      And the 'Cuda jumped forward with a quick but smooth burst.

      I could see he was happy about what he had done,
      He had turned my car into major Mopar fun.

      But he had to be going, he had much to do,
      Lots of Hemis to be swapped in hours too few.

      And I heard him exclaim as he snatched second gear...
      "Have a smooth running Christmas and a Mopar New Year"
      www.BigBlockMopar.com

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: ‘TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS’

        Never, I repeat never, Use Dodge in the same sentence as Toyota or Honda. Thank you!

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: ‘TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS’

          Another one:

          "Twas the night before Christmas and caught at the light,
          Was a Supercharged Camaro and no cops in sight,
          I will try, I will try, I will try with this 2 liter motor,
          To beat this damn Camaro, even with it's big blower.

          As light goes to green and I pull like no joke,
          The Camaro erupts in clouds of tire smoke.
          Now Smasher, now Rev-ver, now Stroker, now Blitzin,
          These are the names of my four VTEC pistons.

          Racing ahead I'm the Star of the action,
          But I know I'm in trouble when that blown Camaro gets traction.
          Grabbing second, I hear the RPM sing,
          My rearview mirror is blocked by my Shopping Kart Wing.

          I now hear the roar, of that big monster gaining.
          All I can do is keep that four-banger straining.
          In a second, the shockwave hits with a blast,
          And my stickers go flying, now a thing of the past.

          Don't bother with third, 'cause now it's too late,
          Just try to act cool, like you can relate.


          Looking up at the taillights as they get smaller,
          The driver backs off just to give me a holler,
          "You can't win them all," he says in fling,
          "You may not win any in that silly thing,"


          I scowled and I revved and let out a sigh,
          & did my classic trademark high speed fly-by,
          Then I smiled and revved as I pulled out of sight,
          With my new mods tomorrow, it will be a better night."

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: ‘TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS’

            One I wrote for the Diplomat page:

            T'was the night before last, and all through the hood
            An Eclipse and a Mopar were up to no good
            The guy in the Mitsu drove with a wild flair
            The Dodge just sitting, idiling, without a care

            The import guy noticed the old Mopar parked in the lot
            He stopped, looked, wondered and thought
            "This guy can't run! Just look at that pile!
            That piece of shit hasn't run right in a while!"

            "There's no chrome on the rims!
            No huge pipe for the gas!
            Even if I gave him a head start this guy will always be last!"

            "There's no tint, no stereo, no headlights of Xenon,
            There's no stripes, no nitrous, not even some neon!
            It's bad enough that it's dark green, but then this fact!
            The hood itself-it's flat black!"

            T'was the night before last, and for many nights to come,
            every one of the ricer's friends would tell him that he was dumb.
            They called the old car a Super Bee, and they said it was fast.

            Then they told him to get a new car. Eclipses suck ass!
            Editor-at-Large at...well, here, of course!

            "Remy-Z, you've outdone yourself again, I thought a Mirada was the icing on the cake of rodding, but this Imperial is the spread of little 99-cent candy letters spelling out "EAT ME" on top of that cake."

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: ‘TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS’

              LMAO off at you guys......here is the Camaro Santa rides in now
              Enjoy the videos and music you love, upload original content, and share it all with friends, family, and the world on YouTube.

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: ‘TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS’

                Originally posted by etbird
                Never, I repeat never, Use Dodge in the same sentence as Toyota or Honda. Thank you!
                i KINDA AGREE, that was what I was raised racing, my Daddy was a Mopar man.......even though I am a Chevy Ma Ma now...... ;D

                Comment

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