A little after two in the morning, we officially entered Autumn. Enjoy these days of warmth, of reasonably long sunny periods, of the very early leaves falling in bright color, and the faintest whispers of cooler air in the breezes that blow by you. That beautiful time that everybody thinks of…yeah, that doesn’t last long. Pretty soon it’ll be brown leaves choking out everything on your property, little hellions throwing toilet paper rolls at your house in youthful acts of anarchy, and an overwhelming supply of pumpkin spice jokes at your disposal. It’s also time to start looking at wrapping up racing season and beginning the prep for storage for many of you. So once you finish your Scrapple, be sure to get out there and make the most of it before the stores start putting out their Christmas season stuff. Wait…scratch that. They already started.

1. Nooooo…!!!It’s no shock to us that the brand-new Toyota Supra is going to be one of, if not the most worked-over car at this year’s SEMA show. It’s an iconic nameplate with Hollywood connections, racing connections, and is perfectly time for nostalgia reasons. But please, whatever you do, refrain from referring to these builds as “Fast and Furious” representations. And for the love of all that’s holy, please don’t mimic the movie cars.

I’ve got no idea who I’m pleading to, and it won’t do any good anyway. I bet there’s a match for the original orange 1994 version on the floor when we arrive at the convention center.

2. Bad idea.In our latest “California sucks for car geeks” news, the state has amended their Clean Cars 4 All Program. Here’s how this works: If you have limited means, you can apply for disposal funding of the old bucket you’ve been driving, and the state will graciously smash the old car into a pancake. In place, you can get assistance (partial, at least) of replacing it with a “cleaner car” (35 MPG or better), a transit pass, a car-share membership, or now, a bicycle.

Trash your car to make the State happy, get a bike. Way to lead the way, California.

3. Worse idea.

Mercedes is working on the 2020 S-class, their flagship sedan, at a fever pace in order to bring a Level 3 autonomous driving system to the masses when the car goes on sale. What’s Level 3, you ask? It means “eyes-off driving”, or true autonomous driving. No hands on the wheel, no feet on the pedals, no eyes on the road. You know, things that Tesla drivers in their Level 2-spec cars have been doing for a while now. Reportedly Audi has it as well, but don’t be so assured that we will see the technology in the States just yet, because there are still regulations that aren’t quite set in stone regarding your car being smarter than the idiot behind the wheel just yet.

4. Cheat code your way out of this one, you little bastards.
In news that will probably incense you to your core, we learned about a ram-raid attack on an Athens, Greece store that saw the theft of three Playstation consoles. The vehicle that was utilized as a battering ram? A recently restored 1967 Ford Mustang that had recently undergone a restoration. The owner suspects that the thieves used his car in the attack because they thought that the Mustang was built solidly enough to survive the ramming act and would get through the entrance without an issue.

Leave it to a bunch of f****** morons to use a valuable, restored pony car to bash a storefront in for three Playstations. Your mothers must be proud.

5. 11-83, Request graham crackers. Repeat, graham crackers.
Welcome to Interstate 94 in Indiana, just west of the Michigan state line, on Monday night. That tractor-trailer rollover accident is the result of a 75,000 pound semi-trailer combination losing control after the driver had to avoid other cars coming to a sudden stop. Nobody was injured in the accident, which blocked all of the westbound lanes with 44,000 pounds of Nutella, the chocolate-flavored hazelnut spread that looks horrific but tastes angelic. This isn’t even the first chocolate-involved tractor trailer incident this year! In January a tanker trailer carrying 3,500 gallons of heated, liquid chocolate rolled over in Flagstaff, Arizona and in July a truck filled with chocolate milk ran over a ladder on I-24 in Tennessee and wound up splitting a fuel tank open.

The truck’s totaled out, but we bet that most of the cargo is in good condition. Did anybody bring any bread?