July is almost gone? That leads up to August, and the month that we travel the most! We have plans, we have events, we have flying miles to accumulate and at least one of us has a garage full of project car that is still in need of some attention. But that also means that the news bites have been piling up again, so to close out the final week of this month, here’s a roundup of some of the best news blurbs, lightly roasted and served up fresh…-ish. Here’s your Scrapple…enjoy!

1. Three-Hour NAPS?!!!When I was in the military, darting off for a nap on a slow day at work had a term: shamming. While everyone else was out doing work, someone was having a quick snooze on the crapper, doing Beetle Bailey proud. Well, with apologies to PVT. Bailey, we found someone doing shamming much better: a California DMV audit found that one particular employee was conking out every day for three hours for almost four years. And, because her supervisors didn’t properly document anything about the 2,200 hours of work time spent snoring or the $40,000 plus in costs to the state, she was given a warning about napping in the future.

2. Tesla. Drifting. Why?The Tesla Model 3 does not need any help when it comes to controversy…the oft-delayed “mainstream” model has enough issues as it is. But just in case there is some kind of momentum slowdown to the fervor of the fans, a new revelation has been revealed: the Model 3 will have a track mode that will allow drifting.

It’s an EV that doubles as an ego booster to the owner. Does it really need to f*cking drift, too? Asking for a friend.

3. Of course it has a huge bed. Have you measured one lately?!

Chevrolet is proudly touting that the standard-sized bed on the 2019 Silverado is bigger than Ford F-150 or Ram 1500, marking the first time that I’ve heard any truck manufacturer proudly boast about how big and cavernous the back end is. Maybe they have enough room to stuff that “Real People” dork in a rolled up carpet in the back without anything being seen by prying eyes. Moving right along…

4. “Road Rover”.Land Rover recently trademarked the name “Road Rover”, which has set the Internet typists off in a flurry as to what that could possibly mean for Jaguar Land Rover. Could it be a line of EVs? Maybe an admission that nobody takes a late-model Land Rover off-road outside of press junkets and accidents in parking lots? Whatever the case, we do offer one note that would make “Road Rover” seem less clunky and cartoonish: how about just using “Rover”?

5. Well…bye.Once it was determined that Sergio Marchionne was in dire straits, FCA hurriedly moved Jeep head honcho Mike Manley into the CEO position. That was on a Saturday. Monday morning it was unveiled that Alfredo Altavilla, the head of FCA’s business interests in Europe, the Middle East and Africa resigned. Reportedly, Altavilla, Manley and CFO Richard Palmer had all been in the running to take Marchionne’s place prior to the moment when that plan had to be advanced dramatically. We don’t know his reasonings, but from where we sit it does look like Altavilla is taking the news rather harshly, don’t you think?