NewsStand and Online editors and contributors meet for supremacy on the Fontana quarter-mile.

Words and photos by Darr Hawthorne

In early April, a bunch of cocky media-types, both male and female, were invited to race a Super/Comp dragster against one another and, as a bonus, get coached by Frank Hawley, two-time Funny Car World Champ and one of NHRA’s Top 50 drivers of all time.  With that hook the wild bunch of SoCal hot rodding media showed-up at Auto Club Dragway in Fontana, a few with their own helmets.

For a lot of us, drag racing is second nature; an acquired, deeply engrained behavior that is innate.  When it comes to piloting a racecar down a drag strip, it still looks like anyone can do it.

Some of them had gone down this track before in test sessions or even in competition, but now was the time to raise your coolness quotient by winning Frank Hawley’s Drag Racing School 2014 Media Challenge, even if you were a newbie, for about twenty reporters and editors.

Hawley enlisted help from three current NHRA nitro funny car drivers, Robert Hight from John Force Racing, Jeff Arend driver for Jim Dunn Racing and Don Schumacher Racing driver Jack Beckman, all of whom spent one-on-one time to explain the short burnout, help adjust racer dial ins, staging techniques and keeping your dragster straight while racing down the quarter mile.

Beckman is a former instructor at Frank Hawley’s Drag Racing School; he’s got a lighthearted delivery and plays well against Hawley’s straightforward approach.  Kind of a good cop – bad cop approach, but very informative and entertaining.

The morning gathering was spent in the on-track classroom with Frank Hawley explaining the rules and racing format. The crate-motored, big block Chevy-powered dragsters were backed down for the event, somewhere into the mid-ten second elapsed time range and the first orientation pass would be limited to 660 feet, making sure everyone was comfortable in the seat.  The media elite was divided into a pair of teams, headed by Robert Hight and Jack Beckman.

Once everyone had made their first eighth-mile checkout pass, it was quarter mile wide-open and then into a qualifier to pair up the combatants.  Brain farts are common in everyday life, but Professor Hawley had zero-tolerance for one of the participants who drove his dragster way past the 1,320 finish line, almost visiting the top-end sand trap with an open throttle.  That throttle was not from mechanical issue; a lead-footed driver produced it and he was shown the gate.

After dividing the teams, Beckman and Hawley explained the format and the racing rivalries started as elapsed time dial-ins were now critical.

The School’s experts jumped in with suggestions for some who had never appreciated the intricacies of bracket racing.  Jeff Arend spent the extra time to discuss possible dial-in options.

Through the early rounds of eliminations, the editors, the radio guy and contributors from old school magazines like Hot Rod, Car Craft, Camaro Performers and even NHRA’s National Dragster went on the trailer.

Ultimately, BangShift contributor Donnie Couch, a guy who has spent years on dragstrips tuning nitro cars and driving chase trucks, but never drove a racecar down a quarter mile was the victor of Frank Hawley’s Drag Racing School 2014 Media Challenge.

Here’s the final round of eliminations, shot on Couch’s Replay XD camera.

If you are looking for a truly unique experience, Frank Hawley’s Drag Racing School is an awesome team-building group experience for your yearly business outing, rather than another golf or banquet getaway.  The competition can be fierce as it was during the Media Challenge, but with Couch’s victory against the elite in motor media, anyone could do it and have the best day of your life behind the wheel of a ten-second, or faster, dragster.  Hawley is a gracious host and once you get into your supplied helmet and driving suit, you’ll probably see drag racing from a very different view, it looks easy, but it isn’t.  One guarantee, you will have fun!

Classes to perfect your driving skills start as low as $399.  Check out http://frankhawley.com for group and corporate rates for your next outing.