What we have here is a very special piece of camping nostalgia. Do you remember when John Travolta and Saturday Night Fever rocked the disco world with its flashy tight leisure suits and poppy, cocaine enduced dance music in 1977? Well this camper doesn’t because it wasn’t born until 1978. Ah, what a fine year for outdoor recreational equipment. With Vietnam still fresh in the minds of the American public, the reputable brand of Freeway decided to rock the camping world with this astronomically astonishing piece of engendering brilliance.

This all metal fortress comes with all the bells and whistles available. Do you rember your grandmas white couch with tiny delicate daisies embroidererd in the fabric, covered ever so lovingly in clear plastic, that no one was allowed to sit on just in case the pope showed up one day and needed a vacuum sealed sofa to fart on without worry that it was contaminated by you or your sisters sticky fingerprints? Well that’s the same fabric the curtains are made out of! Only these have been dyed murky brown by years of cigarette smoke and spilled bong water.

and now we move on to the food preparation wing of the camper. The stove, which comes equipped with not one but two non functional burners, has been fully broken in by years of toothless, cousin loving hillbillies cooking meth for weeks at a time, stopping only to run to the local stop and rob for Budweiser and pall malls or to fart out another inbred, cross eyed Hermaphrodidic future nascar fan from their over used womb.

The food preparation wing comes with literally inches of room, allowing the owner to spread nearly one carrot out on the cutting surface, if they move their beer first.

The master bedroom comes standard with a twin mattress, big enough for the whole family, resting comfortably on a corrugated aluminum box spring. the Matress is based off a japanese style
Mattress… From Okinawa’s prison camp in 1945. Stuffed ever so elegantly with only the finest of used cotton balls and lawn clippings, the mattress will support any person of any stature. Have you ever had the dream where you are falling, only to wake up and realize you’re still in bed? Well that can literally happen to you in this camper! Why not go to sleep with the excitement of near certain death when just the slightest breeze can topple the camper over and send you careening face first into the splintery plywood roof!

For the bathroom, there is a door that leads you outside. This door believes in the power of free will, much like the philosopher Alexander Rosenberg. If you feel the pressures of digestion weighing heavily upon you, open the door and relieve yourself wherever you feel!

Some may say that a slide in camper can cut down on the top speed of your vehicle. Well, my stupid friend, you are in luck! I have personally and professionally modified this camper to fix that issue! In the Starbord side of this road worthy vessel, I have placed in it several speed holes. They are approximately the size of a .223 56 grain bullet and add an astonishing amount of aerodynamics! You may even increase your gas mileage by placing this in the back of your pickup!

Now, after reading this, you might say this camper may quite possibly be worth billions of dollars!! Alas, you may be right, but you won’t see that price anywhere on it. I have slashed the price to a mere fifty million dollars!!! I am willing to take as little as two hundred dollars, though, or anywhere in between.

The camper currently sits at the far end of our ranch on the mountains, currently being cryogenically frozen and preserved by the Montana winter to ensure it’s freshness. By appointment I am willing to take you on a guided tour of this marvelous metal sculpture. Please inquire via email. Thank you and may the force be with you.