It’s a shame that drivers have tended to get away from applying names to their machines in the literal sense. Sure, we know about “The Crow”, “Goliath”, “Beater Bomb” and others, but it used to be that cars had their names on the doors or on the flanks for the world to see and recognize. There might be ten Willys at the strip one night, but everybody could tell you when the black one with “The Bitch” emblazoned on the doors in bright orange was getting ready to throw down. Same with the L.A. Hooker, or the Detroit Vibrator, or the Eager Beaver, or any other name that cropped up out of the crowd. When in doubt, be funny…people remember what makes them laugh the hardest.
A couple of years back I shot this UTV at a truck and tractor pull. I remember walking by, doing the perfect double-take, snapping a photo and snorting to myself. Some guy, walking by, noticed the “Donkey Tugger” name, smiled, and shook his head. “Now that’s just unfortunate,” he said. In a way, yeah, it is…that’s an image for your head that two-for-one beers at the concession stand won’t erase easily. On the other hand, lots of people will pick up on the joke and might stop by the pits, or will take photos, or will come by and chat up the driver and the team. That’s smart thinking.
None of my named vehicles have had an element of humor: “Warhammer”, “Raven”, “Angry Grandpa”, “Battlebarge”…nothing worth laughing at. But there have been plenty of punchlines painted on the doors of some wild machines over the years. Got any good ones in your mind? Share with the class!
SPONSORSHIP ruined having names like these on your car.
The military themed, LS powered Jeep called Corporal Punishment. It’s now called “One Eyed Willys,” but I don’t think that one is quite as funny.
And in the surreal department instead of puns, there’s a C10 drag truck at some local events painted a very strident shade of yellow, and named the Nuclear Banana.
we had a 1968 Dodge Dart named “Dart-Vader” Way back before some others used it Kids used to love it
Dr. Feelgood – phone – OIC-U812
Hill and Zartman. York US30. Dirty Thirty and Filthy Forty. 33 Willy\’s and 40 Willy\’s.
A gray 1950 Studebaker torpedo back named “The Maggot”. It ran O/Stock and was very consistant and won quite often!
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Absurd Bird. A 68 Road Runner. Welfare Eliminator, a late sixties Ford F-100 that got banned for a staggered well base. Lead Zeppelin, a Hemi Corronet wagon.
Nemisis, A 68 LeMans wagon. Lead Sled, Tons of Fun, both Chevy stocker wagons. Under Dog, Little Screamer, Possum Chaser, all altereds. The list goes on…..
Bent
Back in the 60’s when we were all running high octane Golden Esso Extra there was a car (Chevy I think) that ran at the San Antonio Dragway called “The ESSO BEE”.
There was drag boat that ran in Marble Falls, Texas called “NUCKIN FUTS”.
At the 1966 Indy Nationals I photographed a ’50s Plymouth ragtop called the Lambcharger.
My vega was given the name Vegatron
I like to watch southeast gasers on youtube a lot have names,
I like Mike Finnegans ‘55 gasser with the blown Hemi named Blasphemi. Great names on cars are not totally dead!
Hill and Zartman. York US30. Dirty Thirty and Filthy Forty. 33 Willy\’s and 40 Willy\’s.
There was a funny car back in the 70’s named Shady Glen.
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Color Me Gone
Black Bitch…US30
Tighter And Tighter….Oswego
Big Animal….Oswego
Joeshaynes Joke…Oswego
Screamin’ Jennie…Beardstown
Mouse Muscle…Byron
Vanishing Vega…Oswego
No Big Thing…US30
I miss the era when race cars had names.
We have a 1965 El Camino drag car that is our “shop car” called the Shop Rag.
A Chevelle named the Turd Hurdler Express with a picture of a monkey flinging poop!
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How about the Purple Throbber, Witchdoctor,both IHRA pro mods from back in the day. And Darth Vega, an alky F/C we saw run many years ago at the old Dragway 42. Showing my age here.
Granny’s Grunt on a legal stock Duster, Frenchy’s Bomb, a car called Thumper wasn’t funny but his Girlfriend was “Bumper Butt” ! Loose Nuts, the Detroit Tiger F/C, Oldsmoboogie and a favorite I saw at Detroit Dragway in about 76′, a ragged 68 Camaro with the shoe polish emblazoned name scrawled on the rear quarters..Slop Jar Boogie! A family friend had a 36 foot Cabin cruiser named Miss Mynookie..
Della Woods Funny Hunny, The Rodfather, Jim Heads “Give me head til I”m dead” T shirts. The injecticide chevy, Walts Huffer Altered and F/C, Pete Gates “Gate Job” flopper, Roz Priors “Man Eater” top fuel dragster, Gapp and Roush “Tijuana Taxi”. I remember a car called the Texas weasel and the whiz bang special! Eddie Hills Dragsters were also called Nuclear Bananas!