What happened to the days of finding some run-down, beaten up old hot rod on mags for a few bucks? Sometime around the late 1990s, that well just seemed to dry right up, and nowadays we have people trying to get ten grand out of a bone-stock, six-cylinder Ford Maverick simply because it’s a 1970s anything. Blame the march of time all you want, but as far as this human sits, it sucks out loud. Mostly because I missed the good times, but that’s just complaining at this point. I grew up and watched as the adults surrounding me brought home cars like this 1981 Pontiac Firebird Formula all the time. I remember almost all of them…the 1972 Torino, the 1969 Chevelle, the 1972 Camaro, the formal roof Cutlass…cars that now would sell for a mint were $1,500 classifieds finds all day long in the Auto Trader.

So why on earth am I enamored with this grungy, worn Formula? Because it shows it’s scars with honesty. The outside is the perfect well-worn desert car look and the slot mags are a nice touch. The interior is there, but could benefit from some scrubbing and a new dash pad, and if you could find those old sheepskin seat covers, all the better. There’s a swapped in 305, complete with the chrome valve covers and the Edelbrock “Triangle of Death” on the carb that took the place of whatever died, an automatic, 4.11 gears out back and, if the seller is being truthful, four-wheel disc brakes. The 305 isn’t anything to get excited for, but the rest of the program has promise. Besides, it’s GM Corporate at this point…swap in a Poncho, swap in an LS. Just make the damn thing faster than it is already and you are on the right track.

Pontiac tried their hardest to hold onto the true performance torch, but by the turn of the 1980s that flame had all but died, and the Firebird was no exception to the rule. Maybe the Turbo Trans Am held the place, but the Formulas only really looked the part. We’d leave the decades of wear alone so long as they don’t threaten the whole of the car and get to work making this thing a screamer. The “Joe Dirt” look would really screw with heads when they meet up with the business end of a nitrous-huffing 428 Pontiac sitting behind that massive urethane nose, wouldn’t it?

Craigslist Link: 1981 Pontiac Firebird Formula