It’s been a bit since we had heard of any NASCAR-sourced weirdness, but the strange headlines are always sure to come around eventually. In this case, it’s Kurt Busch and the domestic assault charges brought against him by his ex-girlfriend, Patricia Driscoll. On September 26, 2014, Driscoll alleged that Busch slammed her head three times into the wall of a motor coach during an argument after a qualifying race in Delaware. Busch has maintained that there was no attack, that he repeatedly asked her to leave, that she hit her head on the way out of the RV and that the entire story was “a fabrication” made up to sink his career after he ended the four-year relationship. But it was the testimony that he gave at a hearing in Kent County (Delaware) Family Court that is the most…well, entertaining.

During his testimony, Busch explained to the court that Driscoll is a trained assassin and that the female character in the movie Zero Dark Thirty is based upon parts of Driscoll’s career. He claims that she showed him pictures of bodies and was skilled in long-range sniper tactics. He claims that she told him that she was a mercenary who killed for a living, showed him pictures of corpses, and recounted one time where she “left in camouflage gear only to return later wearing a trench coat over an evening gown covered with blood.” And he isn’t the only one saying it. Michael Doncheff, a personal assistant to both Busch and Driscoll, testified that an obviously ailing Driscoll told him that she had been “picked up by a big man and slammed to the ground while helping round up immigrants at the Mexican border.”

Driscoll did not refute testimony in court, but lashed out during a phone interview: “These statements made about being a trained assassin, hired killer, are ludicrous and without basis and are an attempt to destroy my credibility. Not even Rusty Hardin (Busch’s lawyer) believes this. I find it interesting that some of the outlandish claims come straight from a fictional movie script I’ve been working on for eight years.”

The ruling on Driscoll’s request for a protection order will come soon, and you better believe that we will keep eyes on this big bundle of insanity and report what the outcome is. We don’t know who is more disconnected in the head here, but if we were in Kurt’s shoes, that race car would have more armor than the Death Race Mustang. You know…just in case…

(Courtesy: AP via Newser)