My in-laws have been hem-hawing around the issue of a new vehicle for a few years now. It’s not like they don’t need one…between the two of them, there is a 1997 Tahoe that is…well, I’ll be nice and call it “seasoned”…and there is the 2005 Silverado that I don’t think I can be nice about at all, though it is in better condition. Officially, the Silverado belongs to my father-in-law and the Tahoe is a retired family vehicle. Unofficially, the Tahoe is my father-in-law’s daily beater and the Silverado has double-duty, acting as the “family car” and as my mother-in-law’s alternator-eating, coolant-spitting, blown-speaker daily transportation. Personally, if we look past the fact that neither vehicle is mine and I shouldn’t be that involved, I prefer the Tahoe, but it’s getting to the point of needing some major work (heater core, front suspension, and something done about the funky smell inside) over the Silverado, which reminds me of the 1999 Blazer I owned: gorgeous blue paint over plastic interior, and every last f**king thing going wrong.

For at least two years now, my father-in-law has had the right idea: it’s time for him to take the Silverado back and it’s time for my mother-in-law to get a new vehicle. But she’s like my wife: picky, yet unimpressed by most vehicles. In the past we have looked at brand-new Silverados, Tahoes, and even an Avalanche or two, but in the end the argument settles: the new ones are too expensive, end of story. Can’t blame her there. Have you priced a new Tahoe lately? They are within spitting distance of the house I recently bought. That isn’t a joke, either. Gently used ones here around BangShift Mid-West don’t exist, either…either they are priced through the moon for a low-mile one or they have been beat on like a featherweight who got cocky and jumped into a heavyweight bout. The subject of a replacement vehicle had actually been dead for a few months, between the Imperial making sure that the asphalt driveway doesn’t go anywhere and our new house, but Tuesday Haley texted me a link to the local Chevy dealership and asked if I would look over a 2013 Tahoe LS that had appeared on the lot.

While Haley meant “look at the ad online”, she meant “online”, as in look at the webpage, but I am who I am. In my defense…ok, there is no defense. I just wanted to see the truck in person. I wound up back at Campbell Chevrolet, and right off the bat I got J.T., the salesman who hooked us up for the Chevrolet SS drive a couple of weeks ago, out with the keys to the Tahoe for a look-see. Low-mile it ain’t (pushing 90,000) but the truck has a unique history: it was owned by someone with an attachment to the Sheriff’s office here locally, was slavishly serviced at the dealership, and there are records – lots of records. For a white SUV with a tan interior, it’s unbelievably clean…I wonder if the Sheriff’s office has a professional detailer on-staff. Driving it around town made me think I was rolling a Cadillac instead of a Chevrolet (so smooth…) and when I brought it to where my mother-in-law works so that she could see it, she was sold. Literally, within ten minutes of her seeing the truck and getting the information on financing, down payments, etc., we had an agreement. The fastest I’ve ever seen a non-gearhead commit to a vehicle prior was about two days.

The process of acquiring the vehicle itself was as easy as it gets: A credit check to verify that they could afford the Tahoe, the basic paperwork, and a few signatures. No joke, the total time applied to purchasing this vehicle wound up being about forty minutes. In all of the dealership purchases I’ve been a part of, it’s taken at least a couple of hours of my day to cover all of it! A few signatures and I rolled the Tahoe off of the lot, ready to hand-off to the other woman who tolerates me daily. The price was nice (not disclosing, but the dealership priced it well beyond fair) and the kicker to this whole thing? That “customer referral” thing exists here. Guess who’s getting a check in the mail for giving the local Chevy dealership business? What can I say…I’m happy to help!