The only thing better than what I end up seeing with my own eyes is what you see with your own eyes and share with all of us. Real life is better than any story writer, because at the end of it all you’re standing there, frozen, trying to digest what just happened, knowing it occurred but not believing it. I still can’t believe I watched a tweaker try to stun a cop by throwing STP at his face before making tracks for the front door. But you guys have sent in better stuff.
Customers request the most random crap. 80% of the time it’s just “get me (PART) for (CAR)”. Then you get some of the more outrageous requests the other 20% of the time. For example:
“Had a customer ask me for 5 gallons of sulfuric acid today. I said what? You mean electrolyte? ? Yea thats what I want. Duhhhhh.”
“Oh, uh, yeah, that’s what I need.” Either this person’s mind was wandering and they just weren’t paying attention, or maybe they have a 55-gallon drum that’s filled with what’s left of the accountant that they need to get rid of in a reasonable hurry. You never know, and it’s probably for the best that you don’t know.
Of course it’s for my car. You got a problem with that?
Another one:
“Best one I ever had was a customer got mad at me and left when they were buying parts to tune up their car they were getting ready to sell. I suggested an air filter. The response was “It doesn’t have 1, it’s fuel injected. Why are you trying to rip me off??” They then turned around and walked out. I made sure to tell them to have a nice day. Mental note: Do not buy a car from these people.“
I’m convinced that the licensing regulations in this country need to be tightened up, just to keep people like this from being able to own a vehicle. How do you not know the basics of vehicle operation? I understand not knowing gear ratios and in-depth stuff, sure. But I know people who, in adulthood, cannot for their life tell me where the dipstick is on their car, even when it’s the big yellow ring thing right in front of them. It’s actually sad to see their genuine surprise when you reach for said ring and they start to get excited, like “Oh, there it is! I would’ve never found it if you hadn’t shown it to me!” Are you kidding? Have you never looked under your hood before?
(Don’t answer that. We all know that the correct answer is “no”.)
If you have similar stories and want to share them, link up with the UPCG Facebook page (link here) or email it to [email protected]. We’ll keep your name out of it. ‘Cause we’re good like that, yo.
In my youth I worked at a VW/Mazda/Subaru dealer. Bugs have no coolant and rotarys have no valves, not in the traditional sense. We had a service writer that sold a valve job on a rotary powered car and tried to sell a coolant flush on an air-cooled VW boxer.
Since he was SUCH a good salesman, they “educated” him a little and kept him, until his liquid habits forced their hand.
Couple of recent ones for you.
Guy came in looking for some premium synthetic “for cheap” (first problem), and an oil filter for his 2003 Acura TL. He said “I usually leave work redlining it in first gear to beat the traffic, but lately it only lets me rev to like 4000 RPM! So I’m gonna change the oil.”
I just smiled and nodded, and sold him a jug of synthetic.
Another guy came in after recently buying the cheapest, shittiest brake pads on the market (not from me, obv!) for about $15. He wanted a magical “anti-squeal” that he could spread on the FRICTION SURFACE of the pads to stop them making noise, and that he’d seen it on the Internet for about $15.
I hadn’t heard of such a thing so I sent him on his way… But why buy $15 brake pads, with no anti-rattle clips, install them poorly, complain about squealing and then drive around the city looking for a $15 tube of SOMETHING that you rub on the brake pad to (no doubt temporarily) stop noise…. Instead of just spending $30-35 on brake pads and new anti-rattle clips….
I worked behind the counter at Giant Auto supply in the mid 80’s in Chicagoland.
We’ve all heard the stories of how things go wrong when the guy sends his wife/girlfriend to the store to buy parts. This is the one I will always remember.
(before you ask, yes, she was blonde)
A young lady approaches the counter and asks for a tune up kit for her boyfriends car. I say sure we have tune up kits for lots of different cars, what’s the year make and model?
(are you ready for this?)
Her response, in all seriousness :
“His car is blue”
I smiled and nodded and asked her what his phone number was so I could call him and be sure I sent her home with the right parts.
I just spit on my iPad roflmao
it works both ways on the counter,too—sent the ex to get a battery for my bike—i knew they had it,i wrote down the exact number,the year,make and model,etc—she comes back with the wrong one—i asked her what happened and she said that when she asked if it was the right one, the dork behind the counter(when he finally decided to wait on her),told her,”sure,if it fits”—last time they got any of my money……
Friend of wife told her that is why she leases so that she does not have to worry about maintenance. 30,000 miles and has never changed the oil.
Sometime in the mid-80’s we were hanging around the parts store trading BS.
As we were standing around waiting for something to happen it did.
A kid and his mom strolled in carring a completely mangled valve spring compressor.
I remember thinking ” This ought to be entertaining” Well as expected, young idiot explaned that the rental valve spring compressor was destroyed by using it to remove a coil spring from the front end of his car.
Damn fool was lucky his head wasn’t taken off.
Naturally his story was that he was given the wrong tool.
Naturally he didn’t get his deposit back.
I’ll tell on myself….
My young daughter was learning to drive and the drivers manual had a section on checking your car before you drive. She was worried she would get tested on this so she asked me to show here the “stuff in the engine”. So we go out to the 2008 Mazda3 she is going to get to drive and I show her how to open the hood we get around to checking the oil and car dad cant find the dip stick, yes it has a big yellow handle that says oil. The car had about 20,000 miles and I have change the oil 4 times. I had never pulled the dip stick I just drain/change filter and add 5qts. “Dad is that it ?”
I’ve worked 20 years in the auto parts business, 16 with Murray’s (now O’Reilly’s), 2 with Hastings and 2 with Fisher where I currently reside in the beautiful apocalypse of Detroit. Of course like many of you I have seen it all from being seriously asked to turn a rotor worn down to the cooling fins. But my all time fave was a gomer wanting twenty feet of 1/4 rubber fuel line and hose clamps to replace his brake line. I tried to explain to him the tremdous amounts of pressure in a brake system and that the hose will just expand and eventually burst and he could kill somebody. I think even today he is still tabulating what I said. Eventually I pointed to the front door in a complimentary manner.
I’ve gotta a couple… first is i needed a pinion seal for a 9″ ford at “Oreallys” naturally i’m ask what it is for. So i said you wont find it in your coputer look it up for a f100,counter boy insist on what year i said doesnt matter really pick a year so after 5 minutes of tryin to coach him into findin it he ask me what the car was again so i told him a 79 malibu his response was “they never put a ford rearend in a chevy malibu”. But my best one is its about 5 minutes before we close,i’m workin at a parts store that has been in business since 1917, a mazda truck comes pretty fast into the parkin and isnt slowin down,he jumps the sidewalk n plows thru the double pane window,backs up in parks ,comes into the store while the owner is shittin his pants n askin him what the fluck was he thinkin!! The replied i know you were gettin ready to close n i need this and holds up a brake hose so i ask him what is it for n he says my truck out there n i said your shittin me right n he said no i just tok it off cuz it was leakin…i thoght the owner was gonna choke him!!!
Shit disturber. Could’ve just told him to look up a 1960-whatever Ford for a pinion seal. 😛
We were working at a shop and out front a guy had met a man and his wife to sell a boat and trailer.
We were watching the transaction and bs’ing when the wife comes in to the counter and asks “Do you guys have wire adapters for boat trailers”?, we found what she needed and she left only to come back to say, ” I’m sorry to bother you again, but do you guys have two inch balls”?. Needless to say after I spit my soda all over the place and regained composure, I got her a two inch trailer ball, she never even batted an eye.. Lol
my cousin’s “blond” friend was taught by her dad to check the oil on her old, oil consuming car. Unfortunately she didn’t quite under the “710” cap, so she would top up the oil THROUGH THE DIPSTICK TUBE.
damn fast fingers….should say “understand” the 710 cap…
i recently had an interesting auto parts event at the local Parts Source. I went in looking for a 15405 v-belt.
Unfortunately I ran into a 16 year old with an attitude and no clue how to do his job.
I asked him for the belt. He said they didn’t have it without looking at the computer. I told him that the brand they sell Dayco, uses that for the part number, and asked him if he could look it up. Having worked in one of these stores years ago (and they still use the same system) I even told him how to do the part number search for it.
All I got was a dumb look, a loud sigh, and “what year car is it for”?
After explaining that it wasn’t going to be in their computer due to a custom bracket to mount a Delco 10SI alternator to a 360 AMC motor in a 1975 Jeep J10, the little turd starts tapping away and tells me “the biggest motor in a jeep that year is a 258…do you even know what motor is in your jeep?” He spun the monitor around to show me how stupid I was, with this look of absolute disgust on his face. I quickly looked at it and somehow he managed to look up a 1985 Jeep CJ.
I just reached over, took the keyboard, did a quick search and found that they were out of stock. I spun it back around and showed him how to do the search by part number, then left and went to the next store that their inventory program said did have it in stock. Took the guy there about 2 minutes to find it in the back for me.