This could be our most dastardly, evil, and murderous pair yet! Two truly awful and bloodthirsty vehicles will challenge your very moral fiber today as we continue to weed out the weaklings in this long ass first round of Celebrity Car Death Match. This daily series has captured the hearts, minds, and work avoiding attitudes of America, for this we are thankful. Before we delve into the macabre world of today’s contestants let’s look at yesterday’s results.
[box_dark]Bigfoot 1 from Take This Job and Shove It VS The 1967 Chevy From Fast and Furious 4
Bigfoot DEFEATS 1967 Chevy hauler
This was the most lopsided win for any competitor yet. Poor pairing by the bookie![/box_dark]
Ok, so we made you smile remembering Bigfoot 1’s debut to the world in Take This Job and Shove It but today we’re going to make your very soul shiver with the thoughts of evil depravity centering around two of cinema’s most godforsaken vehicles. Interestingly, they were in two of history’s most godforsaken movies, but this ain’t Siskel and Ebert (god rest their souls). Let’s go to the ring and see what we’re dealing with here!
Staring creepily back at us below is the famed “Goblin” truck from Maximum Overdrive, the Steven King written and directed 1980s movie. When aliens decided to purge Earth of is population, they did so by taking control of mechanized vehicles like big rigs, bulldozers, and other stuff. The trucks worked in roving gangs to kill, pillage, and destroy all of the humans that they came across. This truck, formerly a part of the “Happy Toyz Company” fleet is the gang’s leader with its weird flashing eyes and even weirder homespun paint job. The truck itself is a White-Western Star 4800 and it causes the deaths of several people in the film along with terrorizing many more. Because the truck is being controlled by the aliens, it is driverless and therefore should face another vehicle that appears to be controlled by other worldly forces that us normal humans can’t understand and seem powerless to stop….
The movie “The Car” was and still is pretty terrible. That doesn’t mean it sucks to watch, it just means that there’s lots of unintentional comedy, low budget production value, and a general lack of any sense in story telling. That being said, the basic story rules and is centered around the car below, a demonic machine that is driverless through the whole movie, even when killin’ folks. The vehicle began life as a 1971 Lincoln Continental Mark III and was customized by George Barris’s shop. For a movie car this thing is pretty mean looking in a slightly cartoonish way. Barris built four of these cars in six weeks for the movie. Apparently one of two still survive in the hands of collectors who don’t mind owning SOMETHING THAT COULD WAKE UP, KILL THEM, AND THEN DESTROY THEIR ENTIRE TOWN. Owning this thing would be like getting offered Bobby Brady’s Tiki God statue. No GD way is that thing coming in my house. You saw what happened to the Brady family after that thing entered their lives….but I digress. The Car killed lots of people in this movie. It shoved them off cliffs, mastered the art of the fatal hit and run, it kills police that are chasing it, causes property damage to a cemetery, and generally makes life pretty bad for people in the small town that it is terrorizing. You don’t want to see this thing in your neighborhood.
YOU KNOW THE COMBATANTS NOW YOU NEED TO VOTE! WHICH DEMONIC OR ALIEN CONTROLLED VEHICLE WOULD WIN IN A DEATH MATCH? THE INFAMOUS CAR FROM “THE CAR” OR THE MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE “GOBLIN” BIG RIG? EXPRESS YOUR VOTE BY COMMENTING BELOW!
the car.
The Car. Its so bad ass. One movie i woundnt mind a modern remake of
The Car!
The Car.
Yep,theCar.
Satan vs Aliens? Satan will suck the soul out of an alien! The Car.
Close one but gotta go with “The Car”.
I loved the Goblin truck and hard driving rock sound track of the movie but ultimately it lacked conviction and in truth the Goblin wasn’t the mass murderer that “the Car” tried to be. In the end it was just a big ugly truck in a mask.
“The Car” on the other hand is horrible, will always be horrible and there is nothing you can say that will convince me the car and “The Car” wasn’t horrible… and… once again proves that Barris had a few a good years and then spent the rest of his days building cheap, horrible ugly stuff that somehow continued to add to his status. On the other hand, “The Car” set the tone for the possessed vehicle genre and led to classics like Christine, Maximum Overdrive and even “Duel” (Albiet this one had a driver). For this reason alone “The Car” gets my vote
The CAR of course! “What evil drives…THE CAR?” I have the ERTL scale model on my desk right now. It drove through a house! There has never been a better use of a Lincoln Mark III than what Barris created with The Car.
Should have put The Car up against Christine. That would have made it more interesting.
The Car.
That one would be hard to determine on which one would win. BOTH were possessed by the Devil. I would say they would both fight to the bitter death with that one.
It’d be Christine by a 1/4 inch.
“The Car”.
Because both movie’s sucked it should be a draw with BOTH cast aside,but being somebody must “win” The Car gets my vote.
What the heck is wrong with you people. The Truck was WAAAAAY cooler.
The Car. The sound of that horn before you got run over is reason enough.
No contest. THE CAR!!!
Goblin
homer!
Car should have been vs Christine and goblins should have been paired with the truck from duel IMO.
I’ll go with the Goblin on this one because my childhood memories were haunted by the glowing red eyes of the goblin truck.
The car. Im amazed no one has reproduced one. What kind of car was it anyway? The BangShift detectives need to dig into this one.
The car was a 71′ Lincoln Continental Mark III. The car was build by the man no other than himself by George Barris.
The CAR!!! And, the engine sounds the CAR made were awesome! Sounded like a NASCAR V8 doing victory donuts. Plus, ending in a fiery death with a giant demon coming out of the fireball… good stuff!
Clearly The Car. I always thought it was so darned cool.
I would say the Car would win this match. Satan himself drove the car.