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BangShift Question Of The Day: Pick A Car That Deserves To Die And Pick Your Method!


BangShift Question Of The Day: Pick A Car That Deserves To Die And Pick Your Method!

I don’t know all of Brian Lohnes’ vehicle-based past but if there is one thing I know, it’s that if he was to ever get a free pass to a demolition derby event and only had to pick his chariot, the words “Chrysler Pacifica” would come flying out of his mouth so fast you’d swear that the man was telepathic. The 2004-2008 Pacifica is a bloated whale of a crossover that was underpowered, filled with faults of just about every type and plastics that just plain sucked, and smacked of what was to become the DaimlerChrysler era trademark: the feeling that Chrysler got the shaft dry when it came to the vehicle design budget. Ask any owner and good luck getting anything nice and positive out from their lips. Ask Lohnes, and he just might turn into Satan before your very eyes…he hated that wonder turd that much.

We all have a vehicle that sits at the “bottom of the bucket” list for varying reasons. Mine is the second-gen Chevrolet S-10 Blazer. I’ve owned beaters and shitboxes before, but the Blazer earned it’s way onto the number one entry on the death list due to the fun I experienced with a 1999 three-door model. I bought the rig thinking that it would be a solid, mature choice for a young soldier who needed to stop playing with hot rods. Countless trips to the dealership for warranty work, a sticky throttle, self-destructing spindles and electrical faults like you wouldn’t believe left me so bitter about that platform that I refuse to have anything to do with one that doesn’t involve homemade napalm.

So, with that, we have a two-part question for you today: what is the one vehicle that has earned your ire, and just how, exactly, would you exact your sweet, sweet revenge?


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4 thoughts on “BangShift Question Of The Day: Pick A Car That Deserves To Die And Pick Your Method!

  1. Brendan M

    I would drown a Prius in a pool of crude oil.

    Not that it’s the cars fault, but most of their owners are self-righteous, smug, douche bags.

    1. 75Duster

      I was thinking the same thing, only I would get all the Prius together and let a MOAB take care of them.

  2. Chevy Hatin' Mad Geordie

    Any Ford with an LS in it.

    It would be killed by feeding sheds of the driver/builder into the motor after an intimate few moments with a log chipper with the throttle jammed open until it exploded!

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