.

the car junkie daily magazine.

.

BangShift Test Drive: 2016 Dodge Charger SRT Hellcat – More Side Effects Than Prescription Medication


BangShift Test Drive: 2016 Dodge Charger SRT Hellcat – More Side Effects Than Prescription Medication

You need no introduction to what the top-tier model of the Dodge Charger line can be. The Hellcat legend is cemented…707 horsepower for the masses in cars that are the farthest cry from boredom possible. Trolling complaints about weight and age aside, the Charger/Challenger Hellcats are the most weaponized cars you can buy for realistic money…for this kind of power, your next step is into a six-figure exotic with the temperment of a Hollywood starlet six seconds away from another round of rehab. When Lohnes got his hands on a six-speed Hellcat Challenger, he told everybody what that car was like in full song…and he likened the power to the kind of drugs that would make members of Mötley Crüe misty-eyed with nostalgia. Which is why I’ve actually avoided driving a Hellcat until now. The allure of 707 horsepower, and the knowledge that this car might as well be forbidden fruit, is one thing. But the other side of the coin is that this car is putting down easily 50% more power than the most potent vehicle I’ve ever owned, on 275-series rubber. Amateur hour is over, kid. This is the real deal.

You will notice in the pictures that the B5 Blue Charger that the guys at Martin Dodge cut me loose with is wet. It was a rainy day in Bowling Green, with leaves on the ground and on nearly every street. In these conditions, even the Great Pumpkin Mustang can get crossed up and silly. Which led to me standing at the counter, signing the test-drive form, taking possession of the red key, while looking at the falling rain outside and muttering, “What the f**k am I doing?” over and over again to myself. This was not smart, but I couldn’t resist the temptation anymore. Get me the needle, I have to try it for myself. After filling the car up (no Low Fuel Level light, like when I drove the Charger Daytona a few months back), I was sent out on my own, with just a verbal promise that I would bring the car back in one piece. You know the price, you know the ultimate numbers, so there is no point in re-hashing any of that. What you want to know is what a Hellcat virgin thought of his first crack at the car while driving it in the November rain. Here’s my take on FCA’s pet monster, which you can read by scrolling through the photos below:

In case you need a reminder of what the party piece is all about: 6.2L V8, 707 horsepower, 650 ft/lbs of torque, eight speed automatic with a manu-matic mode and paddle shifters, and enough menace to completely re-wire your brain. The low wail that 2.3L IHI supercharger makes, even around town at legal speeds, is enough to make certain parts of you tingle. That noise alone is worth the cost of admission.

Ever since the Charger sprouted four doors, it’s been the angry face of Dodge, and the current generation SRT Chargers do pissed-off better than any other car on the market.

Tons of power necessitates good brakes, and the 15.4″ (front) and 13.8″ (rear) discs stop this car alarmingly well. Almost too well for normal use…you need to train yourself to be feather-gentle with the pedal, lest you bounce your passenger’s head off of the dash when the Brembos dig in.

This will become a familiar sight to any Hellcat owner. Make no mistake about it, this son of a bitch is thirsty. Not “Oh, I’m only getting low twenties on the highway” thirsty, either…

…the best I did in my drive was 12 MPG, and that was straight-up egg-under-the-gas-pedal hypermiling the car. Be prepared for when OPEC sends you a thank-you Christmas card.

Other than seats that will do their best to hold you tight when you decide to let your bravado work the throttle, the interior is standard Dodge Charger…some cheap bits, but overall a very nice place to kill some time. It has all of the driving modes you could want in the Performance Pages app that you can bring into the main gauge cluster…so you can see a boost gauge, temp gauge, etc.

The Performance Pages deal is really in-depth, and covers just about anything you want to know, including just how much of the available power you are actually utilizing. And yes, you can move those gauges (both horsepower and torque) into the main dash.

You’re reading that right: two horsepower. If you listened really closely, you could hear the Hellcat actually call me a pussy. This car isn’t just an enabler…it’s the demon on your shoulder, poking at your ear with the pitchfork, urging you on. “Go on…just a little bit. You’ll like it.”

Around town, the pressure of your foot resting on the throttle is pretty much all you need to be a decent human being. You’ll get a tease of blower whine but the Hellcat can be docile. Think of it like a bouncer at a club: be respectful and cool, know your limits, and you will be having a good time. Step over the line, however, and rest assured, what happens next is going to hurt. This isn’t just a healthy powerplant, this is real-deal, no shit power, and it can and will get away from you in a hurry if you don’t know what the hell you are doing.

Surely, I’m just repeating what everyone else is saying, right? Ok, here’s the truth: shortly after these photos were taken, I went to one of Bowling Green’s emptier on-ramps to Interstate 65, made sure I had nobody nearby when I aimed the Charger at the Interstate, and gave it a shot. It lit the tires off at a quarter-throttle. On the Interstate, I went a little deeper than quarter-throttle at 65 miles and hour and the tires cut loose as if I had been standing still, and would’ve carried on spinning tires until either I flung the car off into the woods or I reached triple-digit speeds. The hype is legitimate, the car is no joke. The exhaust note is vicious, the blower whine unparalleled, and the sensation is second only to a combat take-off for sheer overwhelming sensation. And I didn’t even find half-throttle.


  • Share This
  • Pinterest
  • 0

9 thoughts on “BangShift Test Drive: 2016 Dodge Charger SRT Hellcat – More Side Effects Than Prescription Medication

  1. Gary Smrtic

    Twelve miles per gallon? Hell, that’s great! Our then-new ’64 max wedge only got 4-6 on a good day on the street, and it wasn’t as fast, had radio and heat delete, etc. This is an amazing bit of engineering right here!

  2. Wang

    After driving a Plum Crazy Hellcat Charger
    As a bonafide Chevy nut for 50 plus years
    All hail the Supercharged Hemi

    Wang.

  3. doug gregory

    Excellent write-up Bryan. Braver than I would be on wet roads. My under-3,000lb Chevy II will get silly at any speed when it’s wet out if I use anything more than my little toe on the skinny pedal and I know it’s barely over half the power. You need to go back when it’s dry. BTW….saw my first SRT Durango today.

  4. dj

    Love the Hellcats. They\’re look so cool through my rear view mirror. 90% of their owners can\’t drive them on the street. 8% don\’t dare to push the gas pedal down. The other 2 %, I haven\’t run into one of them yet. My cam only LS1 hasn\’t been beat by one yet (sorry Geordie).

  5. Scott Renshaw

    I told Bryan to come back when it\’s dry and we will have some fun in the B5 Charger. he couldn\’t have been a more humble guy when I handed him the keys. If he asks nicely enough, we might pull the Octane Red widebody Hellcat out of the showroom for him.
    Gary, if Bill is your son, I sold him his Challenger.

  6. Scott Renshaw

    I told Bryan to come back when it’s dry and we will have some fun in the B5 Charger. he couldn’t have been a more humble guy when I handed him the keys. If he asks nicely enough, we might pull the Octane Red widebody Hellcat out of the showroom for him.
    Gary, if Bill is your son, I sold him his Challenger.

Comments are closed.