I won’t lie: within my group of friends, a mix of gearheads, military folk and like-minded delinquents, the “free candy” van has been a staple of jokes for years. You know exactly what I mean…the cargo van with no windows that creeps around schools, making parents and police nervous. It’s a joke, nothing more, but sometimes that joke goes too far. In this case, a white Ford Econoline with “Free Candy” in red paint, along with some smeared handprints, freaked out a California community so bad that the local news team tracked down the owner of the Ford to find out what the hell was happening. The answer: the van was done up for the Burning Man festival in Nevada, and that the owner is glad that neighbors are willing to report a scary-ass cargo van with red handprints all over it.
Seriously, dude, next time just get an ice-cream truck and dress up like a Killer Klown from Outer Space. That might get you in less trouble with the locals that a pedo-van.
There’s a Free Children van been seen in my area – it’s a trap for nonces – that’s what we call pedos in the UK. Inside its plastic-draped interior are a few concerned fathers armed with chainsaws.
I don’t care who you are that was funny!
Candy has been taken prisoner?
Man, the pedo-van was my plan for a LeMons racer!
I used to joke that I wanted to get the vanity plate ‘FREECNDY’, put it on a van and pick up my nephew from school.
Went online the other day, and guess what plate is now taken?
Needs to up it a notch and put pushbars on the front
Is this the same van that Hillary Clinton used to try to get voters for her campaign?
Google images “Hanna Montana Concert Shuttle van”…
You gotta laugh!
Sam