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Scrapple, Your Guide To The “meh”-Worthy News! This Week: The Usual Drama Du Jour! (That’s French, Too!)

Scrapple, Your Guide To The “meh”-Worthy News! This Week: The Usual Drama Du Jour! (That’s French, Too!)

It’s been a strange, busy week for us at BangShift. Chad’s getting down, dirty and greasy with his projects, I’ve been at OSCR VI, and Lohnes has been making his rounds and covering down in the back this week. Spring is in full force…the weather is bi-polar, the races are on and numerous, and the trees can KNOCK OFF THE POLLEN ORGY any day now. Are you sneezing your head off? If not, feel lucky. We will be bringing you some awesome coverage from the Spring Fling Million event, so in the meantime, stick around, grab a plate full of slightly roasted news bites, and enjoy. This is Scrapple!

1. You like Game Of Thrones, do you?

Carlos Ghosn, the former chairman of Nissan, has not had a great 2019. He was arrested and jailed in Japan on charges that he underreported his income, and had been jailed up until the beginning of March, when he was released on about $9 million in bail to house arrest with no internet. On April 4th, he was arrested for the fourth time and on April 9th, he released a video to YouTube that proclaimed that he was innocent, and that he was was the target of a conspiracy that was completely against him due to fears of a full merger with Renault instead of remaining as alliance partners.

If treachery and drama is your thing, make sure you have the popcorn ready.

2. Is that better than unintended acceleration?

While we’re on the subject of Nissan, there is another problem…this time involving a car they make. Specifically, the Rogue crossover. The NHTSA is investigating claims of “unintended braking” in 675,000 2017-2018 Rogues. No injuries or deaths have been reported with the incidents, which see the Rogue’s automatic braking system go to full-stop without any kind of obstruction in the path of the vehicle. Word is that Volvo’s safety teams are looking into adapting the defect into their own cars as part of their zero-death program.

3. It’ll fit just fine? AWESOME! Wait…what was the other part?

Yeah, yeah…the “Hellcat everything!” joke has run it’s course. FCA isn’t going to make a Hellcat Pacifica no matter how awesome that would be. But that doesn’t mean that shoving Mopar’s supercharged alternative to erectile dysfunction pills into products that don’t come stock with them isn’t a thing. Look at Jeep, for instance…between the relatively new Wrangler and the brand new Gladiator pickup truck, wouldn’t a power bump well above the Pentastar V6 be welcome? Yeah, but don’t expect it to come from the factory. At a meeting with Australian press, FCA head Tim Kuniskis said it plain: “Everybody always asks me that question: it fits. You know that. It fits like a glove. But the problem is that it fits like a glove and there is no air space around the engine and the whole external space of the vehicle so you have no crush space; you have nothing that can be used to absorb energy in a crash. It is not a problem to put it in – other than emissions and fuel economy – except it would never pass any crash tests, and that’s a problem.”

Well, damn. At least that is a solid answer. And there are aftermarket companies that can help you out if you just have to have it.

4. It says right here in the employee’s manual: “DO NOT…”

We’re pretty sure that this will never make it to a “Real People” ad from Chevrolet. A former employee of Mountain View Chevrolet in Chattanooga, Tennessee by the name of Daniel Bryant, is under investigation by an FBI task force after a victim came forward, alleging that after he brought a recently purchased pickup truck to the dealership for servicing, Bryant offered him a ride home. After the victim, who has partial paralysis and has lost a leg, got into Bryant’s vehicle, Bryant is believed to have threatened the lives of the victim and his family, and forced the victim to make withdrawls over the next two days that totaled up to nearly $200,000. Bryant also allegedly confiscated the victim’s credit cards and at one point, forced the victim to smoke crack cocaine.

Like you needed yet another reason to hate dealership salespeople, right?

5. You ain’t from around here, are ya?

The red car you are seeing is a brand-new Peugeot 508GT. It’s a 225 horsepower turbo-four four-door sedan that has a bit of a sport flair. And if you were in Europe, the United Kingdom…it’d be perfectly in place. But this car was shot in Atlanta by a Jalopnik reader, which while not too surprising (it’s known that Peugeot is trying to re-enter the U.S. market for the first time since 1991) it is kind of surprising to see the 508GT in Georgia, of all places. It has a bit of an Acura-meets-Jetta kind of look to us. Not sure how it will do once it gets past the “novel” phase, but at least Peugeot isn’t returning to the States with an SUV leading the way. Not bad.

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2 thoughts on “Scrapple, Your Guide To The “meh”-Worthy News! This Week: The Usual Drama Du Jour! (That’s French, Too!)

  1. crazy canuck

    FCA has the latest ad out that shows a JL racing around making v8 noises false advertising sue em and use the money to hemi my jk yah thats the ticket

  2. BeaverMartin

    The Gladiator really should have a V8 option. I don’t need the hellcat, just a standard 5.7 and 4.10s. Better yet give me a modern M715 on the previous gen Ram 2500 chassis with the Cummins and a D60.

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