In recent days, the drag racing world has been freaking out about a few things and they all involve John Force. The first thing was the announcement that Force would be racing Chevrolet “Camaro” funny cars in 2015 and the second thing was that the NHRA had allowed John Force Racing to “convert” his Mustang bodies into Camaros by changing the sticker package on the car while Chevrolet works on a Camaro body for the team. Now I am totally in favor of everyone having an opinion and being able to voice it. I get to do it every day here on BangShift. Debate, argument, and passion are the things that drive the world. Not just the drag racing world but the world in general. It’s just that there are times when such things devolve into a mire of hilarious hypocritical ranting that grinds my gears. Essentially it boils down to this. The same people who are screaming and yelling about funny cars being all but identical aside from the stickers are the same people melting down because Force was allowed to swap the stickers on a funny car that they already believe is identical to every other one out there in the class. I’m good with people hating on stuff but I really just wish that the people would pick a clear direction on which way they direct said hate. You can’t expect to be taken seriously when you debate a point and then when your point is validated you freak out in the other direction.
As many of you know, I work as an announcer for the NHRA at drag racing events all across the country. This will lead lots of you to think that I am writing this as some sort of defensive piece for the National Hot Rod Association but I am not. It is more an observation on the pervasive “everything sucks” culture that I have railed against in the past. Said culture is still thriving especially here on your local internet. I’m not interested in dropping historical examples of the same thing happening years ago or debating the rightness or wrongness of the decision from the NHRA to allow this procedure to be executed on the Force team cars. I’m just interested in trying to figure out how people are so passionately hung up on this circular argument.
In every form of racing ever devised on Earth, certain things happen. The most central thing that happens is that the cars and trucks evolve. A top fuel dragster does not look like it does by some happy accident. Those massive cars have that look, shape, and size because of mechanical evolution within the given rule set presented to competitors over the years. The same can be said for NASCAR stock cars, F1 cars, soap box derby cars, and even swamp buggies. The very nature of closed course racing means that there will always be a “best” way to complete the race the fastest. Left unchecked, the cars we see in all forms of racing today would probably morph into something different in better over the course of a few seasons but for the interest of safety and parity, rules are in place to keep such a thing from happening.
Funny cars are not immune to this phenomenon and that’s why the box-like shape we see today with the pinched “dog house” on top of the car is the basic design we saw in the Mustang and we now see in the Charger, Toyota, and “Chevrolet” bodies. There’s nothing stopping Chevy from designing a funny car body that looks really close to a 2015 Camaro…other than the will to win. I love old funny cars. I like the way they look, I like the attitude that they present, and I like the fact that there are so many of them running at so many strips these days. Those cars obviously appeal to an age bracket a couple up from my current one but they appeal to me for the same reasons. Modern funny cars appeal to me as well. When I was old enough to know stuff about drag racing, the famed Dale Armstrong “Batmobile” was streaking across my TV screen on Sundays with Kenny Bernstein at the tiller. It can be argued that this was the car that set the wheels in motion to slowly morph the floppers into the shape and sizes that run over 300mph today. Racing bodies have a heck of a job to try and manage the future of their sports while trying to keep their fans happy with the product on the track. If the ultimate goal of professional drag racing is to create machines (within class rules) to cover a standing distance in the quickest time possible, fighting the air is a critical battle. Funny cars would NOT look anything like they do today if teams were allowed to do whatever they wanted with respect to the body design. I’d love for the cars to look like close cousins to their factory produced inspiration but that ain’t the fast way.
So that leads me back to the original premise of this rant which is the insane frustration I experience when people argue against themselves like they have a mental problem. Here’s a breakdown.
Today’s funny cars stink! They don’t look like cars and the only thing that actually makes them different are the stickers on the front and the back. You could pull all the stuff off of those bodies and you couldn’t tell them apart!
Ok, this gentleman is clearly annoyed that the funny cars of today don’t resemble their factory counterparts and that every cars has a nitro burning hemi engine. He thinks it would be cooler if they had to run the same types of engines that were factory available. Oh wait…it seems that our hero is piping up again.
The NHRA let John Force swap the stickers and turn his Mustang into a Camaro! This is a travesty and I will NOT stand for it!
Can you understand my frustration here? This week I had a debate with a guy who was pulling this same move and I couldn’t even get him to reconcile with his other personality. I think that it is perfectly good to have a passionate opinion on both of these subjects but I sure would love it if most people would just pick one side of their argument and stick with that. If you are going to hate something, by all means do it. I’m not here to stop that. Just please have the sense to pick a clear direction to breathe that fire in.
I always thought that the Funny Car body was just the whipped cream on the overall sundae that is crackling huge engines and fireballs belching out of hood scoops while cars scream down the track at Ludicrous Speed.
” Ludicrous speed ” ….. Plaid paint jobs ????
Nah, then they’d overshoot every event by a week and a half!
LOL ……
they are all just flying doorstops, the best shape for reasonable safety, find it hard to believe there is brand loyalty when they are really the same underneath except for the crew chiefs set-ups. They could run them with no stickers to identify them for all I care, LOUD, FAST and SAFE is what its all about. Am happy for the car makers support of the sport I like.
I Agree …
To those people who are bitching about the John Force and the body / sticker change.
John Force is not only a racer, but he is a businessman with a multi – billion dollar operation that he has to sustain in order to keep his employees gainfully employed as well as keeping the business running so that he can eventually pass it down to his family when the time comes.
For a business to remain successful it has to constantly evolve with the times. After what had happened with John Force Racing last year with Ford / Castrol backing out, non of this surprised me.
Look Mr Lohnes . I get it that some of hypocrisy is getting up your nose . One minute complaining all Funny Cars are the same … the next complaining cause the Mouth of the Midwest stuck his stickers on a Camaro .. that looks like a Mustang … that looks like a Dart … that looks like a Camry et all ad nauseam
But the fact is Mr Lohnes . The Funny Car category ( as well as Pro Stock ) do suck !!! Big time . And its obvious by the lack of crowds at races as well as the dwindling TV audience numbers and rapidly diminishing sponsors that my opinion is in fact the opinion of the majority . Not the minority
So hows about Mr Lohnes ? Instead of bitching at us for demanding change in a motor sport many of us once loved [ even those being a bit hypocritical ] and doing an F1 [ its all the audiences fault , not the FIA/F1 ] How about placing the blame firmly on the shoulders of those responsible ?
That being ; The NHRA . The idiots making the rules as well as the morons so out of touch with their audiences to the point of bringing the sport to its knees and ultimate destruction .
For the record Mr Lohnes . I’ve been calling for the same in F1 [ who at this point are chasing the NHRA for first man in the coffin status ] So don’t take this personally .
Rather I say . Get INVOLVED personally ! Start advocating for the kinds of changes that WILL make a difference as to the future of the sport , rather than bitch and complain about those willing to take a stand as well as admit why they’re no longer attending/watching NHRA events .
If for no other reason than ( your own ) Job Security ! 😉
PS; Like one suggestion , along with making Pro Stock go back to being Pro STOCK , capping body styles for Pro Mod at 1959 and making Funny Car once again resemble the damn cars they’re pretending to be ?
Get the Mouth of the Mid West to retire . Or at the very least get his and his family’s faces the ___ off our TV’s . The man’s rhetoric is nothing more than the words of a hyper overweight humming bird blathering advertising shill and his kids are even worse . I mean seriously . How much advertising does the NHRA expect us to put up with ? Damned annoying and a royal pain in the @$& sums up Mr Force and family in a nut shell
I will bet that when you squeezed this one out it left a stain in your shorts…
Never start a sentence with ” look ” In my opinion It’s insulting . & yes the N.H.R.A does need an enema in reference to their T.V. audience ….
Let’s face it they all could be Toyotas on the outside. Chrysler Hemis on the inside and we would either love them or hate them. OH THATS WHAT THEY ARE !
So, what politician did you meet?
“You can’t expect to be taken seriously when you debate a point and then when your point is validated you freak out in the other direction.”
Oh I see this in so many places outside of racing too. I agree whole heartedly!
And I thought Force was from California?
I’m even more shallow than the guy arguing with himself about the FC bodies.
I completely tuned out and lost 100% interest with the loss of 320′.
NHRA national events less than 1320′ are just a bunch shut off test passes to me.
Chevrolet will have a new Camaro in 16 so why do a new full body now? In a year John will have a new racecar body. It’s a bandaid. Works for me in the age of “what is it” FC racing. They need the downforce. I get it but, slow’m down and put something car like on them. Oh, the 70s.
As to Mr. Martin’s point, and if he combed his hair right it wouldn’t show……….
I understand John Force speaks highly of him also……….
As for hate; I would have to know some one very well to hate them. Those that annoy me, I simply ignore.
Brian – point well-taken and well-stated. You have a solid argument there and it goes along with the nay-sayers constantly complaining everything sucks. Everything doesn’t suck. Most things are either your cup of tea or not. If its not that doesn’t immediately mean it sucks. I think an entire line of cars based on FWD is stupid, unexciting, and works against better physics. Obviously I’m in the minority as there are multiple millions of these lemming machines scattered across the country. How anyone can go into a dealership and get excited about bringing one home is beyond my comprehension. Yet…they are popular.
I’m not overly happy with most top levels of racing these days, but that doesn’t mean they outright suck. NHRA races 1,000ft because they haven’t had an epiphany about how to do the whole 1/4mi safely. Me….I’m not in favor of dialing back the power by any method. The advancement of the whole top fuel system is what still keeps me interested despite even a dragster carrying the label ‘Toyota’ on it. I almost totally gave up on NASCAR with the COT and still will only catch the road race events if I’m not doing something else. I think many of the sanctioning bodies have lost their way and need to regain some lasting connection with their roots. I have no idea how they will accomplish that, but that doesn’t mean I am going to forsake the abundance of racing out there today nor will forsake patronizing the racetracks when I get the opportunity to go. If people don’t go to a national event because ‘top fuel and pro stock suck’ then they are missing the whole show for what amounts to about 15% of the event. And who doesn’t like standing near the track when a pair of fuelers, regardless what they look like, thunder down the track….?
And Brain, Mr. Martin took a shot at you by saying your rant was motivated by your desire to keep your job with NHRA. He’s entitled to his opinion, but history tells a different story and validates your position on the matter. I know this piece was not written out of self-protection. Its a tirade against the opinion that everything sucks these days. You can’t win them all over Brian or get them to listen to reason. How do I know you are right….? Nostalgia racing continues to grow by leaps and bounds. We have a legit 5-second, street-driven vehicle proven to cut the mustard in our midst. I’ve seen street-driven cars run 200mph + then button it back up and drive the thing thousands of miles home. The ‘good ole-days’ are still keen, but there is stuff happening today that was never possible back then.
And that’s why I only go to nostalgia events i.e. NHRA Hotrod Reunion in Boiling Green!
Corporate sponsors, hidous bodies, cult of personality. This is the funny car/pro stock clown show. I know there are those who love the noise and the smell but c’mon, how do these things even remotely show any likeness of what we can buy or see people driving. I personally think this is a disservice to fans. In the pursuit of crazy ets and top end mph there is nothing here to represent factory dimensions. Just my worthless opinion.
People are idiots, thats why.
Doesn’t bother me in the least. I haven’t been to a NHRA event since the 1981 Nationals. Have no wish to ever see another one either, especially not on tv. T/F, F/C and Pro Stock don’t turn my crank like they did back then so why waste my time and money. Ditto on NAS CRAP.
Wow! And I thought I was crusty, guess not cause I still see value in the NHRA and I admire John Force and his team.
I suppose haters gotta hate, it’s what they do.
I know I personally hate the bodies on funny cars these days. They are all the same-same. Dont care what stickers are on em. I thought it was hilarious when I saw a Toyota sticker on a top fuel car the first time. What a joke. At any rate I would still go to a NHRA event if I got the opportunity. Why? Those cars are awesome to watch and hear and feel as they defy physics racing down the track. I love watching the fuel cars at night. the lights on the cars and the fire out of the pipes add a whole new dimension. I dont watch them on TV any more unless I just accidently run across it as I am scanning to find to find something to watch. I only watched part of a couple races last year. Pro stock is pretty much the same as well. I used to go to the big Indy show when I lived up there and I would go to the Ennis texas show every year when I moved to OK. The price of going has gone up to a point where it is just not worth it to me any more. I have also been dissapointed in Pro stock ever since Ford got out of it and the cars all started to look the same-same just like FC and Pro Mods. I still say though, if you have never been to an NHRA pro event, you really should go at least once. You will never forget it.
Another spec racer class, like Indy, F1, NASCAR, and road racing have become. As soon as the word “fair” entered the racing world it was over. Safe is another word. I get it, no one wants to see someone hurt or killed, but safe has become synominous with fair and the ever dreaded cost effective. I have enjoyed all forms of racing due to the innovation and ingenuity involved. Since we have engineered all forms of racing to go as fast as we want, and we constantly hear how they need to reduce speeds, why not put slower bodies on them and engine packages closer to stock so the ingenuity process can still occur? As soon as you start worrying about what the manufactures want the series is done, just look at IMSA at the end of the glory years.
This why the Nostalgia series is so darn popular. Let NHRA have there way and let the cards fall where they fall. As long as they keep it up the Nostalgia craze will grow. Don’t like the current Funny Cars? Get hook on the Nostalgia racing series and relive drag racing the way it used to be. But don’t be surprised when it too begins to morph, it will happen one day. Time marches on.
Dan
So you’re saying that people are hypocritical morons? You didn’t think drag racing was immune from that kind of mentality did you? Peiople are idiots, especially the ones that rant non-stop… So what else is new? Let them rant, they’re just making fools of themselves… I love the modern floppers, they’re the most badass cars around, and I love the nostalgia floppers , for every reason we all love them… But haters are gonna hate, so what else is new? Great editorial Brian, hope it opens the eyes of the haters just a little bit, ya never know
And excuse any spelling typos, I’m typing on a very cracked screen on my cellphone… Can’t see what I’m typing… (All my money goes to my race car lol)
Well said on everything Doug Gregory. I personally lost interest in NASCAR and NHRA a long time ago. Have always been more into the street machine side of things and just like you said, their capabilities are mind blowing these days. On the john force thing, I look at it as him just doing what he has to do to keep things going for his career.
Wish I could care, but I stopped watching NHRA racing a several years ago when it got just brutally boring.
Still, it’s amusing to read some comments here, especially that tool TJ Martin.
What a schmuck.
The NHRA jumped the shark with the thousand foot nonsense and everything’s gotten worse since.
They oughta take a hint from NASCAR who actually listened to the fans and made the cars look more realistic.
Meh, whatever happens, I doubt they’ll fix things well enough to bring me back, and as diehard a fan as I was, I don’t miss it at all.