New year, same old ingredients: take press releases hyping new products we could care less about, cars that don’t come close to our radar, and some of the worst quotes and diatribe from the automotive news, smash it all together, and serve with enough hot sauce to drown out every other flavor in the mix. Here’s the first serving for 2015, hold your nose and take a bite!
1. Buick goes topless for the first time in 25 years!
Do you remember the Reatta? Nope? Good! The Reatta was Buick’s last attempt at a convertible, and that was in 1990. Much like then, the idea of a convertible Buick is a bit polarizing…but what the hell, here’s the Vauxhall Cascada, which will hit our shores as a Buick in 2016. It’s essentially a Verano convertible, but don’t get that excited: it’s a 200hp droptop that didn’t even get the manual transmission option that the Verano gets. It does come with a “turbo over boost” feature, which sounds oddly like another recall item to us. Congratulations, Buick: just when rental companies were wondering what would replace their aging Chrysler 200’s, you provide an answer.
2. Mopar is bringing two more modified Jeep Renegades to the Detroit Auto Show
FCA is bent on making everybody love the Jeep Renegade, and to hammer that point home two more Mopar-ized models will be making an appearance at Detroit: the “Off-Road Mopar-Equipped Jeep Renegade” (wow, way to name that one, guys…) is a tweaked Renegade TrailHawk with what basically amounts to paint, a Katzkin interior re-do, and a topographical map of Detroit on the hood. Okaaay…The other one, the cleverly-named “Urban Mopar-Equipped Jeep Renegade”, is a Limited 4×4 model with the same paint-and-Katzkin-interior setup, but in gray and orange and with a bike rack on the back. This is what Mopar has come to? Paint, stickers and color matching interiors? C’mon, guys…
3. Dodge offers a “have it your way” menu for the Viper. Burger King mulling lawsuit.
At least one mental light bulb is working over at FCA, because Dodge just announced the Viper GTC program, which is a concept-to-delivery custom vehicle program for Viper customers. You can pick the colors (8,000), stripe packages (24,000?!), wheels (10) any options available on any street-legal Viper (hello, TA bits). Before your Viper heads down the production line, you receive a “speed form” model with your color and stripe selections for your personal review. Upon acceptance, the car is built and the progress at Connor Avenue can be tracked. No two cars can be identically optioned, and the buyer has the choice of delivery or the option to pick the car up at Connor Avenue (which comes with a free plant tour). The final nail in the narcissistic coffin are the plaques: the buyer gets two dash plaques, one with their name inscribed, and one to hold onto…y’know, for sentimental reasons or something like that.
4. Chevy, meanwhile, brings back the “do it yourself” option for the Corvette ZO6
As if the stereotypical Corvette buyer didn’t need another reason to continue talking about their car. GM is bringing back the “Engine Build Experience” (“Do it your damn self?”) program for the Corvette ZO6. Basically, buyers pay $5,000 (before travel to and lodging in beautiful Bowling Green, Kentucky) for the privilege of building the supercharged LT4 for their car. Included in the package is a day at the Performance Build Center with a technician (who will watch over you to make sure you’re doing it correctly) and professional photographs. Buyers can also opt to watch their Corvette be built at the plant and can take delivery of their car in the lobby of the National Corvette Museum. With some of the recent ZO6 engine failures, one has to wonder if this is a clever move by GM to put the blame onto the customer. “You built it, you broke it!”
5. Speaking of Corvette…
Reportedly, the holy grail of Corvette rumors was spotted earlier this week for about fifteen seconds: A GM mule, very roughly disguised as a Holden Ute, but with a C7’s roof and A-pillars, a hacked bed area, a 2×4 on posts at the rear bumper for when it breaks down, and enough security around the car that it’s assumed that the spy photographer is missing. Like a flash fire, the Internet blew up, with a lot of people claiming that this is proof of a mid-engined Corvette or a possible second model, which for the sake of simplicity I’ll refer to as “Corvette Zora”, following a known trademark filing by GM last year. I’ve seen the pictures, and while the roof treatment is tantalizing, the big question on the body surrounds the hacked up bed, which looks like it’s missing real estate between the door and the rear wheels.
I don’t hate the Renegade for what it is, I understand that Jeep has to diversify and sell some vehicles to average non-offroad people. But did they really have to run the Renegade name through the mud?
“run the Renegade name through the mud”? Really? If i recall correctly, the last time we saw a Jeep branded vehicle in conjunction the the Renegade name was a cheesy 90s sticker & body kit package on the YJs. Prior to that was a cheesy 80s sticker package on a CJ. Maybe it’s time the Renegade name was run through the mud.
The have it your way option for the Viper is the bee’s knees. All hyper cars/high end sports cars should be built like this. Nothing worse than paying over 100k for a car and seeing one just like it at the yacht club that afternoon. I would never drive the Renegade, but they will sell like hotcakes if they’re cheap. They look like shopping mall fodder. Real Jeeps were made by AMC IMO (Excepting Willy’s of course). As for the Buick convertible it fills a niche of older women who live in warm climates and are willing to trade their small, friendly, unexciting, CUV for a small, friendly, unexciting convertible.
So I spend an extra $5k for an engine I built to go in my new Vette? I’d rather spend more for an engine Lingenfelter built to go in my new Vette.
Unrelated, but you got me thinking. I rebuilt my first engine at my neighbor, Mr. Johnny’s house. He was a WWII vet and expert mechanic. It was a priceless experience. I wonder how much people would pay to rebuild the engine, trans ect. at a place where the tools are provided and an old timer is there to give them guidance. I asked Mr. Johnny why he let me use his shop/tools when I was a kid a few months before he died, and he said he just enjoyed the company. I think they need a place to link up old gear heads with the younger generation.
I’d second that.
The only way to cross the automotive generation gap is with little bridges like that.