Tough truck competitions started out honest enough: whose truck was capable of man-handling an off-road course of bumps, jumps and other assorted obstacles. The goal was to be the fastest, and to not break stuff in the process…or, at least, keep the carnage to a minimum. What happened? Now, the tough truck competitions are more like the middle of the Flavian Amphitheater during the height of the gladiator, with carnage and theater being the more ideal case. Or, in less flowery talk, winning isn’t so much based on competition time but by audience roar, so the higher you jump, the more dangerous the driving, and the more shit you break on a run, earns you a place on the podium. Or, at least I think it does, based on the performances of the drivers you will see here.

I’m not going to lie: watching this video left several key areas of my own body aching in sympathy to the straight-up ass kickings these drivers gave themselves. You can pretty much list out what was going to hurt the next morning without anybody asking the driver after the run. Headache from hitting the roof? Torqued back from pirouetting a Jeep Grand Cherokee onto the protective wall? Suddenly have a need to sit on a soft ring thanks to a perfectly flat landing and an even flatter bench seat? That does not bother the drivers who showed up to show off for the crowds. Go find your mouthguard again, this is going to make a demolition derby look like a cakewalk.