You asked for it and we’re giving it to you. That is right, by this time next week BangShift.com will have switched names and formats to become the hotly anticipated Bieber Site. This will be your online hub for all things Justin Bieber. We’re talking hair styling tips, Lamborghini crashing advice, douchey behavior dos and don’ts, and all the teenage angst we can muster.
BangShift co-founder Chad Reynolds had this to say about the change, “For the last couple of years Brian and I have been debating doing this and after the two of us managed to win free front row tickets to a Bieber show a couple months back and we saw him live, it was a natural decision. When we decided on this site name a few years ago, who could have predicted that it would all work out so well. BS into Bieber Site? It is like a message directly from the heavens.” Lohnes added, “This guy is a once in a generation type of entertainer. From the poor choices in dress and his truly abhorrent attitude and demeanor, how can we not dedicate our lives to following every move that this guy makes….hold on….I have a story coming across the wire. Apparently Justin has decided to buy a puppy. YES!”
Other transformations you’ll notice are physical ones with each of the site creators. Chad has vowed to cut his trademark beard right off his face and live the rest of his life as a weirdly hairless post-pubescent man. Lohnes has taken his smelly Red Sox cap off, throw it gently into the trash and adopted a flat brimmed cap which is worn askew with a beadazzled pattern on it. Said Reynolds, “We’re both turning over a new leaf here. Gone are the days of us actually getting our hands dirty, smelling like nitromethane, oil, and gasoline, and here are the days of supple skin, groomed fingernails, and $400 jeans!” When asked about his Red Sox cap Lohnes was heard to say, “The only socks I care about are Justin’s Georgio Armani’s.” We don’t even know what that means.
Don’t worry though as automotive content will surely be a big part of the site. “Between Justin’s propensity for crashing into things, running people over, being accused of illegal automotive activity, and incessant purchasing of gawdy luxury cars, we’ll still have plenty of car stuff on the site. We are going to completely abandon anything that looks potentially harmful to the environment though because Justin isn’t into that.”
Before the men gave a concrete date for the switch, they both screeched off in their new Nissan Leaf to grab copies of Tiger Beat and other magazines to work on upcoming feature stories for the website.
I just Puked……
After the forum update this is jsut a cruel and twisted joke….there are forum members that are in the freaking ICU because of this…feel good about yourself?
Worst April Fools so far today. Try harder guys.
LOL. “We don’t even know what it means”
Do you guys have to bring this clown, that is worth 130 millions? Seriously?
douchey behavior
You’ve already crossed that line with this fool story.
Whoa, guys! So many people use “douche” or “douchey” as a negative term.
Isn’t a female genital maintenance procedure called a douche a good thing?
What am I missing, here?
My generation had Michael Jackson and Maddona for our daily freak show. This generation has Bieber and Miley Cyrus.
Oh yea Bieber fever baby!
Laugh !
Go Bieber !
Just have to think ; my self at 19 with that mush $$$
I was just a POOR 19 year old ” but still a 19 year old ass hole ” 🙂
God mom and dad didn’t kill me and some how I didn’t kill my self 🙂
Did I say I’m old ?
Do you think that one of those NHRA girls would like him ? hmm
Now that’s a fast car.
Got the money but not the wackers to hit the gas on that car
Not bad . But may I suggest y’all change the name to the Justin Beiber/ Paris Hilton Automotive website from Hell site ? Between the two of them I’ll bet they’ve wasted more expensive iron than all of us combined here will most likely ever own !
Brian, almost as good as the beard prank of a few years ago. I love the “weirdly hairless post-pubescent man” line. That visual had me cracking up!
I am supposed to be OK with having more Canadian content, but we will see.
Chad already has the backwards hat thing perfected but Brian looks more like Biebs You two need nicknames beginning with “Lil” to be part of his inner circle.
I started reading and stop at the part where it said you both (Brian and Chad I assume) won tickets and actually went to see Justin Bieber in concert – respect level just went down a few notches.
I realize/hope its a attempt a humour but I’m just not seeing it or laughing for that matter – the guys a TOTAL PEANUT .
As far as changing the name – whats next a sex change for Brian or Chad
Are you delibertly trying to lose your Aussie connection?