As I’m writing this, I’m watching a friend of mine wrestle with himself over the Internet in regards to a car purchase, and I’ve got my best “L’il Bastard” smile across my face because I’m playing the devil on his shoulder, whispering “do it”, he knows I’m doing it, and any second now he’s gonna cave.
Here’s the case: this guy is afflicted with the same fondness for unloved Mopars that I have. He has had a Gran Fury and a couple others, but that was a few years ago. Lately he’s been borrowing friends cars, because his last purchase, a well-used Dodge Neon SRT-4, literally fell apart before his very eyes. As a truck driver, he doesn’t have a lot of time to spend hunting through car ads, so lately he’s been Craigslist surfing…problem is, he’s restricted himself to his home state of Florida…you know, that little peninsula state surrounded by salty ocean? Yeah…the Mopars that live there are either babied and garaged or have more holes in them than fine Swiss cheese. Unlike me, he isn’t as picky when it comes to his cars (in fact he might have the worst case of automotive A.D.D. I’ve ever seen), but his other idea is a typical drift car build that would be at home at Hot Import Nights. Mopar it is.
It’s a 1978 Chrysler LeBaron. Just under 20,000 miles on the clock (claimed), fairly nice condition for a 36-year-old car, $2900. I’ll openly say that I’m highly skeptical of the odometer reading, but even if it’s really 120,000 miles it’s in decent condition. I’ll be shocked if anything other than a 318 lives under the hood, and I’m really not suspecting any rust right now. In fact, if it weren’t for the small bit of missing paint on the front bumper valance, I’d say it’s like new. And it’s in my backyard. I already know what’s going on here: before he started his route for the day he loaded up a search engine to look for “Chrysler+LeBaron” and hit enter. At some point during some downtime he looked at the results, saw this one, and went into the kind of “I want it!” mode that is normally seen in hyperactive and sugared-up six-year-olds in malls during Christmas shopping season.
I won’t lie in the least: I’m hoping he seals the deal on this car. Mostly because he would have to drive to Florida, take time off of work, and fly up to Nashville to get the car. Knowing him, that means he’ll have me look it over, possibly do the purchase, and hold onto the LeBaron until he gets here. Since the Imperial is no further along, it satisfies my urge to drive an older Chrysler, plus it works for him, since I’ll know what to look for before he attempts a cross-country trip in the car.
Am I evil? Yes I am, but this is BangShift…we are enablers here! Everybody chant with me now: “Do it…do it…do it…”