We’re thinking that even the car crusher’s gag reflex would trigger when it tried to squash this Pontiac flatter than a piece of bacon. Why? Look at it for cripes sakes. There’s the huge wire wheels, the flat tires, the fact that someone lopped the whole roof off, and then the real show begins. We’ve showed you some pretty shocking and strange automotive interiors here over the years but this one is operating on a higher plane. From the “roll bar” down to the carpet this thing is nearly beyond description. We’re not sure if the design was inspired by the exterior of a watermelon, some sort of psychedelic experience the owner may have had, or just because they said, “Hey, I want something that Helen Keller would even find revolting,” we’re just not sure.
The actual CL ad is quick and to the point. It tells us that the car is fast (doubtful) and that that car is completely custom. One could also say the same thing about a mobile home a bulldozer ran through as well, although it would probably have a more pleasing color pattern. The guy is looking for $3,000 for the car and we even tried to do the nice guy thing and come up with some logic that would make $3,000 seem acceptable. There is none. The thing has no roof, like literally. There isn’t one that folds up like a convertible, it is 100% roof free. We just want this thing killed with fire before it multiplies and mutates, taking other G-bodies down with it.
Too harsh? Too mean? Is there redeeming value in any of this car? Feel free to point it out to us because we cannot see it!
Thanks (?) to Brian Blackstone for the tip on this creation.
Here’s the full text of the ad –
53,000 miles.. very fast..great transmission..completely custom!!
Text me for more details 440-258-2294
$3000 obo
I’d rock it. Like seriously, with a 40 ton granite boulder.
On a fair note, what else would you use that material for if you somehow came into possession of it? Like if your great-aunt died and left you 6,000 yards of watermelon velour?
I don’t think that “roll bar” is safe to sit on, don’t even want to think about it holding up in a roll over! My bet is its made from 2x4s
I bet it was made from cardboard wrapping paper tubes.
With the snow on the ground maybe they are thinking twice about cutting the top off
Good thing I didn’t eat before viewing this piece of crap. On sale just in time for the spring crack/pimp season.
The best way to start on this is to take the battery from the drivers floor and pour it’s contents all over the interior. To have enough acid you will probably need 3 or4 more batteries.
No thanks – he removed $3000 worth of stereo equiptment…..there’s nothing left that’s worth anything!!!
Man you straight up playah hate’n
Call me crazy, but I like the paint scheme, in an ’80s lowrider kind of way.
But looking at the interior for more than ten seconds makes my head ache.
Proof of insurance and registration are right here in the ….uh……. glove compartment……uh
(440) is NE Ohio, PERFECT weather for that topless wonder. smh.
the fabric pattern somehow reminds me of hypnotoad…ALL HAIL THE HYPNOTOAD.
Hell I’d rock it. I wouldn’t take it seriously though. I mean how could you with the rust. I don’t hate it. I’ve seen a lot worse. It’d would be one of those cruizers that nobody saw coming. Don’t hate. Your rat rod sucks with it’s tractor seats.
So he’ll give me $3,000 to take to the junk yard for him? He better come up another $20,000 before I’d be seen with it.
Gee, I wonder how much those doors sag with no roof to tie the car together. Kill it NOW, before it multiplies. Please.
I’d rock it. It’s really not horrible besides the no roof bit. I like lowriders and even this car is more tasteful than some of the top competitor cars of the past 10 years. I actually like the acid trip interior but would prefer it in a van. Not worth 3g but if it popped up for 1000 with a roof on it I would rock it.
I must have it.
Love the plush interior. I can see my self cruising Las Vegas Blvd. picking up some hot babes with this ride.
This would be great for the D.A.R.E program at any vo tech or any high school. If it won’t scare ya straight then God be with ya!
if that’s a unibody car by chopping the roof off he ruined the integrity of the body and that thing will fold up like a piece of tin foil if it gets hit.
I bet after a long summer day sitting in direct sun the quarters he glued all over the interior feel really nice! And, based purely on stereotype, the driver probably doesn’t wear a shirt and has his pants around his knees so those flaming hot hunks of metal will brand his backside to look like a muddy golf ball.
Only if I get a pimp stick as part of the deal
At first glance, it doesn’t look as bad as many of the cars on CL where someone went nuts with fiberglass and bondo. Start looking at it a little harder, and the laughing starts. He couldn’t cut the roof a little closer to the A pillars?! That roll bar looks 100% that it was made from 2×4’s, then wrapped in that material. The rust and missing trim then pop out. The kicker has to be the flat front tire, so even if I wanted to buy it just to take it offroading to test that frame out, I’d have to buy tires first.
Someone needs to start a show where they go out and buy cars like this, hoon the crap out of them, then destroy them in different, interesting ways.
okay. to start off with….
solid g bodies here in new england are getting fewer and fewer.
a couple of cans of krylon can fix the low rider paint scheme.
a sawzall can fix the “rollbar”. *coughcough*
and both of my kids, some pixie sticks and safety scissors can undo the interior.
it is able to be saved. besides, i have four 15×7 steelies with goodyear rubber on em. easy fixes to save a gbody. or screw it and kill it with a tank like roadkill did to the prius.