First, let’s look at the two vehicles on their own. This is a Dodge Dakota Convertible. You may have forgotten by now, but Chrysler DID build these briefly from 1989-1991. They farmed out the conversion to the famed roof choppers to the stars at ASC, and just over 3000 examples were built in that three year run. Today, they are exceedingly rare, and both cool and weird at the same time. Honestly, I’d rock one!

And this… this is a classic 1955 Plymouth. They are beautiful cars in their own right, and could be had in a variety of flavors and configurations. 1955 also saw the return of the V8 engine in between the fenders for the first time since around World War I. According to the Mopar wizards at Allpar, a Belvedere equipped with a V8 would scorch the quarter in 20.3 seconds. Not great, but you have to start somewhere!

Fast forward a few decades, smoke some drugs, and you get this! Where to begin? First, they cut up a rare (if undesirable) truck and mated the rear end of a classic to it . In the process, they removed everything good about the Dakota (it’s usefulness) and… well, look at it. Also of note: the expert coachbuilder selected the 1992-1996 Dakota front end from the corporate parts bin in lieu of the sealed beam 1987-1991 setup that the convertible trucks left the factory with. I’m honestly surprised there isn’t some round headlights shoved in there to make it look “retro” up front.

I’m not sure if the Plymouth started out as a convertible, but the Dakota’s awkward top resting on the makeshift tonneau of the Belvedere butt isn’t doing it any favors. Also, it has side pipes because of course it does. The trim from the Plymouth extending onto the truck’s door is a nice touch, and really brings it all together. Yeah…

Another view from the back, this time with the Dakota end’s top up. I remember back when the Dakota Convertibles were new, my dad looked into buying one in the mid 1990’s to replace his oil pump-eating 1987 Dakota with the old carbed 3.9L V6. He loved convertibles but when he found out that the tops and surrounding trim parts were pretty much made of unobtanium, that scared him away. Also, I’m begging to know what’s under the tonneau. More seats? Truck-like storage? Empty bottles of absinthe consumed during the build? Who knows!

You’ll be glad to know that the Parisian Brothel Red Velour interior is dirty but still intact! There’s something about the 80’s/early 90’s Mopar interiors that makes them hold up well over time; they seem to be more durable than the ones found in other contemporary trucks. It obviously needs a thorough cleaning to exorcise the deep-embedded smells of sun-baked farts and stale Winstons, but that’s the least of this thing’s problems.